Assumptions that are Hurting Your Sales

Hello, hello, I'm so happy to be chatting with you today about my favorite part of business, which is sales assumptions. Oh my God said nobody ever sent me maybe which is the same reason I'm probably a really good algebra teacher. Like all the things that nobody else loves. 

So what I want to talk about today are the assumptions we make in sales that are not helping us. Humans, you and me, and everyone we know, are really, really good at making assumptions, right? We, some of them are true, some of them are false. Some of us are, you know, quick to assume some of us notice when we're assuming some of us don't, you know, it's one of those things. 

We all make assumptions all day long, that may or may not be good for us. In sales, it turns out, the more I work with clients, the more people I meet, the more people I talk with about sales and process, the more I come to see that we all make a ton of assumptions about sales, both naturally, and ones that are really implied by the traditional style of selling most of us are taught. And many of those assumptions don't help us, they make selling harder, they make us feel kind of icky about it, they make us feel like selling is a burden or something we shouldn't be doing, even when it's like something we're supposed to be doing. But that there's like this secret message somehow that part of it is wrong.

 And these assumptions do not make it any easier to sell. So today, what we're going to do is we're going to talk about which what these assumptions actually are, and what some alternatives are. Because the interesting thing I find about a lot of these assumptions is that while we assume them, we don't necessarily believe or agree with them. What we believe is something far kinder and gentler and easier to sell from, we just don't know we get to use it. And so we're going to sort of bring those out to the surface today and talk about them. So that's the plan.

 Before we get too far down the pike, a couple of things first, if you are not in my Facebook group, please come join us. If this podcast resonates for you, then my group is a great place to be. It is the same name as this group, it is uncomplicated business for teachers, helpers and givers. You are welcome whether or not you identify as any of those things, please come play with us. Second, at the end of October, I'm gonna run a rent another round of the 15 day challenge that I love about making more offers. If you're interested in joining us for that, please come to the Facebook group, or my website, or I'm sure I'll find out I'll make sure there's a link in the notes here.

 But let's do that together. And it'll be super fun. It's going to run live, I'm going to do the training live. And then it's like an email challenge. It's fabulous. people rave about it. And it's so super simple. But I will make sure everybody has access to that. And then lastly, if you if selling is the thing for you. You know, coaching really helps. It helps me every week, every week, I meet with my coach.

 And every time we go, I think like, Okay, I don't really know what we're gonna talk about today. I feel like I've crafted this. And then every week somewhere halfway through the call, I'm like, holy crap. I haven't cracked it. And then we work on something and it unlocks this like new level of understanding, and new things to try and new challenges and new things. I feel like terrified of super fun. But that has enabled me to grow in ways that I could not have done on my own truly, I would love to tell you I can do it all myself. And maybe I could but it would be it would take 100 years versus and so coaching speeds growth period. If you want to grow faster, let's talk about it. If you want to grow faster, and with less angst and anxiety and worry and drama and wasted time and energy. Let's talk about it. That's what we do. 

We help you be more you and when you are more you everything gets easier. Okay, so let us talk about assumptions. I know in the last episode of the podcast, we talked about, you know, doing all the things all at once and the next after that it was how to stop hating sales. So when we don't hate sales, we do you know, a couple of particular things we know the way is ours. We find things to love, we change our internal dialogue. We see the salespeople in us and already the other thing we Do that's really helpful in learning to actually like sales and make it easy is to check the assumptions. 

So there is a list of these, most of them are implied. And honestly, the teacher and me doesn't even believe a lot of these, but it is what we are taught and what I think of as ABC sales, right? ABC sales is always be closing its sales first, right? And it is about money. It is about hitting a number it is about making sure you do whatever you it is you have to do to get to that number. And it also comes with these underlying assumptions about other people in sort of what I think of as this, like lack of faith in them. So here's a couple of things. 

The first assumption that I think is made in ABC sales, is that we can't all succeed. There is this sort of implied scarcity in typical sales, right? It's limited time offer. infomercial kind of bullshit. It is. Only this many spots clerk closing Baba, Baba Baba. And yeah, sometimes cards need to close Yes, sometimes spots are limited, but it's that like, pressure free version of it, that people talk about, that really does apply imply that, you know, this is not for everybody. And we can all do it. And you're some of us are going to fail. And that's gross, personally, like as a teacher that is incredibly contrary to what I believe about people. 

What I believe about people is that everybody can learn that everybody can grow into their full potential that everyone is capable. And so selling, assuming we can all succeed sucks. It's just like blue, selling from a place of like limited quantity and scarcity. And, you know, not enough for everybody is terrible, when in fact, it's not really real, right? I don't need, you know, I can say, hey, seats are limited, but there will be more in the future. I can say, hey, seats are limited.

 But if you need something, we'll figure out another way. I can say, hey, the cart closes, but like not forever. I can say hey, the cart closes. But reach out. If you're if you got like sidetracked off schedule. Like I can be a good human about it. And not be like pressure, pressure, pressure, pressure, pressure, and instill sell just as effectively. It's better for them. And it's better for me. 

One of the other assumptions that I find really difficult goes in the same vein, and it is that people can't be trusted to make good decisions for themselves. This one makes me nuts. Because again, I am somebody who believes in full capability. But in the ABC sales model, there is the sort of implied I need to tell you how you do this, because you won't figure it out without me. And unless I really press you into making this decision, you're not going to make the right choice. I have had coaches I have worked with, but didn't work with for long. Tell me that no is just like a first objection. 

And I understand that on some level, because sometimes, like I'll say to my kids, do you want ice cream? And they'll just say no, because they haven't thought there are times we say no out of fear, I get all of that. But at the same time, if somebody is a no, and they know they don't want to work with me, it is not my job to change their mind. It is my job to trust them. If someone knows a version of something, a way to do something, if I have a client say to me, You know what, I don't think it's going to work that way for me, I get to respect that. As a salesperson, as a coach, as a parent, as a human. I get to say, Okay, I trust you to make the right decision for you. And that's so much of the coaching I do is like, hey, what's the way you want to do this? And then if somebody says, hey, I want to do it like this, it's like, okay, let's look at the pros and cons of that. As long as you think it's going to work for you. 

Let's try it. It's not, you know, you can't be trusted to make a good decision. I have to tell you want to do this is not like I'm not the feudal lord, like this is not. This is not how it works. So in sales, when we work from the assumption that people can't make a good decision, unless we tell them how to do it, it becomes very icky, right? Those are the sales calls you get off of and you're like, Oh, God, I want to have a sales manager I worked with for a long time tell me that, like part of his job was to build insecure 30 and other people that, you know, good sales came from insecurity. And I was like, you know, and I was, you know, that's probably 10 years ago.

 Now, I did not, I can remember thinking new. But I didn't really understand how it was, that was like the idea that I needed to make people feel insecure, in order for them to buy what I have, because that's garbage. And that's not real. Because when people buy from insecurity, you know, if they buy a coaching package out of insecurity, they're not going to show up for the work, they're going to disappear midstream, they're not going to be fully invested, they're not going to get what they need. Like that don't want that client, you don't want that client. No matter what you do, whether it's organizing, or tutoring, or coaching or communicate, well, doesn't matter. It really doesn't. But you don't want the person that did it, because they're afraid that otherwise there'll be, they won't be able to survive. Like that's not a great sale. That's not a powerful sale. That's gross.

 Another assumption that kills me in the sales world, that we that sort of isn't the same as another version of the same vein is, you can't do it without me. So here's the thing, coaching makes a difference. But do you have to coach with me? No, I don't care. But will you move faster with coaching? Yes, I know that to be true. Do I care how you get it? What it looks like who it's with? I do not. I care that you get what you need. I say that to people 100 times a week. What matters more than anything to me is that you get what you need. I don't care how you get there. I care that you get there. 

Okay. And so in this in this sales tactic, it's this assumption that not only can you not do what you're trying to do without help, but if you don't do it with me, your chances are none. It's the like, I am going to save you. And friends, I don't want to save you. I don't want to fix you. I feel like that's like a bad boyfriend problem, right? Like when you're dating somebody that you want to fix, or that you want them to fix you like, that's not a good thing. That is not healthy. Right? If you have for a friend, we've all had that friend that like, was really needy in the you know, just because they were in a tough spot, and felt you were feeling compelled to fix them. 

Like that's not, that's not healthy. And sales from that place is not healthy. me thinking that people can't do it without me. Me implying to people that they can't do it without me that they can't do it on their own. They're never going to get there unless they invest is awful. Will it take longer? Maybe? Maybe not. I don't know what their background is. I don't know what their story is. I don't know what kind of help they have. I don't know a lot of things. So me implying that the only way to success is through me is crap. Like I did have a sales coach, at one point tell me that my job as a salesperson, and I've said this before on the podcast, was to create a hole in other people's businesses, businesses, of businesses big enough for me to fit into. Like that is so deeply messed up. 

So deeply messed up. No, thank you. It's, it's a very numbers and sales driven sort of approach to what I think is a very human thing, we're going to need you to be less confident because we're working together. And I don't need to make you less confident in order to get sales. Like that's the yuck. Another assumption in sales, that I think is really interesting that I Excuse me, I get frustrated by is that in selling that there's such there is such a thing as giving too much, right? That if I give too much, if I am too open, too willing to give too, whatever, that I'm going to fail and people are going to take advantage. Listen, there are people that fail and get taken advantage of because of this, for sure. Because there are times where you know, our reflex to help comes at the cost of ourselves. This is different. 

There the idea that there is a sales strategy, and that's what we're talking about assumptions that are hurting sales, where you can give so much it's like the give the milk away for free, right? Don't need the cow kind of thing. That that's a problem that I have to like that there's some imagine Nery cap, on what I can give an after that, if I give more than that people won't buy anything. Excuse me, is trash. It really is the idea that I could give wrong, that there is some sort of magic amount where I can give 45 minutes of stuff for free. But I can't give more than that is crazy. Here's the thing, if you are doing for free, the thing you're trying to be paid for. And it's because you're not willing to ask for the money, you're not willing to draw a boundary. That's a problem. Right? That's a mission, not a business. 

That's different than thinking there is some like magic tipping point, after which you're going to hurt your sales, because you've given too much. I am a case study in this because I give a ton of the podcast, I have my Facebook group, I constantly do connection calls with people where like, I'm happy to help. I have somebody in my inbox right now who has a local teacher here who is trying to transition out of the classroom, she's just looking for like things to think about, I'm happily going to talk to her. That's easy. I'm happy to do that, I will show up, I will do the workshop, I will I did a workshop for somebody last minute last week. Happily, none of that is ever a problem. It all works itself out.

 So the opposite of this, the assumption that really is what we believe most of the time, especially if you're somebody in my world, because you get it you're a teacher, you're a helper is that giving is never a lot wrong, as long as we're doing it with intention. And here's the difference when we are giving to please people, when we are giving more than we intend to when we are giving without being conscious of it, that's a problem. But when we are giving and we are getting an equal measure, whether or not that getting is money or whatever, then everything works. As long as we are getting as much as we're giving, and it doesn't have to be in dollars, things are working. And that's a very different way of selling. You know, for me, that is much more ABG that is always be giving that is my core philosophy, right? That I can give and also receive an equal measure happily. 

And sometimes it will be dollars and sometimes it'll be like, gratitude, or whatever. But it works itself out. The same is true for you. I know that it sounds funny because it is not the message, traditional ABC sales because it's just not I wish it was. But then again, then traditional sales as it is would collapse. And that's a whole different conversation for another day. But I am a case study on this. I have I could name you 10 people right now who I do this with who are case studies in this, where we just stop worrying about whether or not we've given too much like it isn't just not things I think about anymore. It's really not. And you learn to feel like do I feel out of balance here?

 Do I feel overstretched? Do I need to ask for something back? Or am I intentionally giving this freely? Great, either is fine. As long as we are aware of it, that makes a difference. But it is a very, it is a much more abundant, much less scarce much less. Tight mindset right about sales. The last thing that I find really interesting about hurting sales, or assumptions that are hurting sales, is that it is this core assumption in ABC selling that sales is about me. Right, I'm gonna say that again, the assumption in ABC selling is it sales is about me and about my business, when in fact it is not really not for me, not for you, not for anybody, I don't think it doesn't matter. 

We do sales and selling and success in sales and selling isn't about me. It's about the other people. It's for other people. And for me, that's a way different kind of assumption. Like that I am willing to talk about my business and when I sell so other people have access, that's a whole thing. If I am willing to do the things and be uncomfortable for the benefit of others, that is a much different place to sell from.
Now I had a conversation with a client this morning. And she said you know, she was worrying about haters in the internet and YouTube and all kinds of things. It's funny I have a couple of people worried about this just all at the same time. And she said you know I feel better holding All the content on my website is just feel safer. And that's totally fine. A. But you know, we're talking pros and cons, one of the things that happens is it then limits the number of people she can help. Because people have to find their way to her in a different way. 

Does it mean, possibly there will be less people that don't like her? Sure. But like, it's pretty difficult to not like her. Like she's real likable, and she's doing amazing work. So it kind of just means, you know, this idea of not giving too much kind of just means less people are helped. Making success about me means less people are helped. So for you, here's some things to think about. What do you want to assume about sales? Who is your successful? What do you want to feel free to give? What do you want to assume about other people? Are they capable? Do they make good decisions? Can we, you know, just accept that there is enough for all of us, right? Can we all succeed? 

What are the assumptions that you want to make about other humans? How they by how they respond to you, what you are able to give them? And why? And then how does that impact how you go out into the world? Because really, that's what sales is, sales is how we show up in the world. I asked the other day in my Facebook group, like what's people's favorite thought about selling. And my dear friend Stacey and and put in one of my favorite thoughts, which was I am the sale. My energy is what attracts people. That's true. It is what you put out in the world that creates the sale. It is what you bring the energy, the openness, the willingness that creates the sale, we do not have to scare people into this into buying in when you release the idea that you have to scare people, so that you can be successful. It's a whole different kinds of selling, right? 

Like I couldn't scare kids into learning algebra, and can't scare people into buying coaching. And even if I could scare kids into buying legs, learning algebra, like sometimes you want to do because you were like, You know what, you're not going to be able to progress in your life without this. And that should be scary. But you know, 13 year olds aren't scared by that. They shouldn't be but they're not. So you have to find a way to sell it to them. That is not about scarcity and lack and lack of capability and their their shortcomings. It's all about like, Hey, I believe you're capable. I know you can do this. Let's do it. And that is magic and sales. It's magic. But it's really different from what we're taught. But it works. 

Okay, so for you. If you have questions, reach out. I am happy to talk about this like 100 hours a day. This is what I love to talk about. Send an email, Sara Torpey coaching.com. Come to my website and reach out set up a time to talk fine, reach out to me on Facebook or LinkedIn all good. I'm available in the world. I'm not going anywhere. Interesting right now. I'm here at my desk and I'm here for you because that is the point of my business. You. Alright, I'll see you next week.