Teachers in Business

Teaching and Giving Yourself Permission to be an Expert on YOU with Renee Grady

October 26, 2021 Sara Torpey Season 1 Episode 47
Teachers in Business
Teaching and Giving Yourself Permission to be an Expert on YOU with Renee Grady
Show Notes Transcript

When we know our superpowers, we can USE them to help others to find theirs. THIS - and SO MUCH MORE  - is what my guest this week, the fabulous Renee Grady teaches girls and moms. If you want to use your superpowers for good, AND embrace your OWN expertise (plus help the girls in your life to do the same...) this episode is for YOU.

 Renee Grady: IG @rippleeffectlifecoach


Welcome, welcome to teachers in business today I have yet another Oh my favorite teacher people here. I'm gonna go ahead and make a mess out of her bio, but she's gonna love me anyways, today we have the amazing Renee Grady with us. She is a certified life coach, a UMap coach, which she is going to have to explain to us and a fitness coach. But what she does is she specializes in your middle school girls. So when you get to the age that your girls are in middle school, the first phone call actually I will be. It's true, Renee. She works with those girls and their moms who love them and want help navigating those years. I think for me, it's gonna be moving into her house. She just doesn't know it yet. She hails from Chicago. Originally, she was in the commercial real estate world. And now she after 15 years is officially local to where she lives in New Orleans. She went from stay at home mom to really creating the next phase of career in the coaching world. And she recently added with her husband, she's now the co owner of stretch Lab, which is a multi unit wellness franchise development. She is a mindset and movement enthusiast she I wish to live closer to me so that she could make me go move more. And she empowers women and girls to feel confident in being themselves in what they have to offer the world. She was a program director for a bunch of years with Girls on the Run. She's gonna tell us more about that too, and coached and trained all the girls hundreds of them and their coaches through a social emotional program field running. She is a mom, obviously of teens and dogs blessings, and spends her free time finding new adventures in fitness, travel and self development and in her real estate routes through innovation in home improvement projects. And apparently she doesn't also sleep because I don't know how these things fit together. I can't imagine when she sleeps there, Renee is gonna have to at some point, tell us what the sleeping part of her day happens that Unbeliev it does. So we are going to start the way I start all of these. Talk to me about what it means to you to be a teacher.

 

Um, I am so excited for this conversation because I save this, I didn't want to tell you this before we got started. But my long term roommate in college, who was a teacher just started a business about a month ago of her own. Yay. So this, um, when I think about what it means to be a teacher, oh my gosh, I have so many thoughts. And I lived with her while she was getting her teaching degree. And then I also had a few other friends who were part of their teaching programs and who went on to be teachers. And so when I really, really think about this, you know, through my lens, it's all about teachers using their superpowers to help people get what they want in need, by helping them develop their own superpowers. And that comes in so many forms. It comes in formal education, it comes through experience, it comes through reading it comes through so many avenues. So really, to me, it's all about developing the person. Yes, the content is important, no doubt because that informs what you do but I really just think it has so much to do with developing humans.

 

Well I think that makes a lot of sense. So like this idea what I just wrote down in the corner was teaching using our superpowers to create there's like I'm not like I feel like we should stick that one in the dictionary and just like that should like that. That that's that's everything and that's really like the whole point of all of this right that's the whole point of teaching anyone anything is using what we're best at to create what help them leverage into what they're really good at as we decided this moment extra window is the moment to recycle things so pardon me podcast land for all the noise happening here. I'm so talk to me about what you your superpowers as a teacher are in that lens. What did you teach people before like talk to me through your teaching journey? What are you teaching now? What have you taught? What are all the versions of things you've taught? Like Wha How do you relate to this teaching because you immediately went to like people who are formal classroom teachers but you are a teacher girl.

 

Yeah, it took me a really long time to realize that I was a teacher, um, and really own that, um, because when I think I do think of my friends who went through formal education to be teachers, I also think about my grandmother who I think at a different time would have been in the workforce and would have been a teacher. Um, and, you know, my mom and my aunts. And then of course, through all my different experiences through careers, I have had teachers and mentors all along the way. And so for me, defining it, yes, I love going to the dictionary and looking up, you know, what words mean? I'm such a nerd in that sense. Um, but then when I really thought about what it meant, to me, that's what came out. Um, and so you asked, in my bio, it says, you map coach. And when I found you map, things started to really, really gel for me in terms of what my superpowers were, and what I brought to the party, and I was doing it at Girls on the Run, but I didn't have a language for it. I didn't, I didn't realize that what I was doing was unique to me, and not everybody did it that way. Even though I trained all different kinds of coaches, we had, you know, I was the program director. So I was both coaching girls, as well as training other coaches to serve, you know, a larger community. And one of the things we said all the time was, we need all different types of coaches, we need the girls to see all different types of role models. And so I was like, Oh, I'm one type of role model. But I didn't necessarily see like my superpowers. Um, I knew I was really good. And people would tell me, I was a good coach, and a good trainer. But there was something there was a missing piece. And after I got certified as a life coach, I went to a program that introduced me to you map and it's why Oh, you, you map. And it was a bunch of assessments that when put together gives you a very holistic view of yourself, and it gives you language to be able to say, Oh, hey, this is what I bring to the party. And this is where I'm going to spend the bulk of my time. And it's so fun.

 

I like that, yeah, I get that completely.

 

It was huge for me. Um, and it the it, there's four pillars to it. So the first one is doing your Clifton Strengths. I don't know if you've ever done it. But I, I could talk about Clifton Strengths all day long. And then a really, really deep dive into your values. And people talk about oh, yeah, of course, I know what my values are. But when you really sit down and ask questions, your values inform how you teach and where you spend your time and how that looks. So the values was the second pillar. And then the third and fourth were your day to day scales. So for me, as a coach, and a teacher, I was really, really good at, you know, learning all the girls names immediately and really picking up on what each girl brought to the team. Where, you know, sometimes my co coaches would be like, Renee, it's time, you know, keeping track of certain things. Some coaches had really, really good organizational skills. So anyway, the fourth pillar was all about your personality. And I think that for for teachers going into business, it's so much like a classroom, where you get to bring you to what you're doing. And if you don't, there is a missing piece. So for me, once I once I was able to put it all together in a nice package, I was able to present so much more confidently about who I am and what I do.

 

Well, and it's that like, oh, wait, this is what I'm really good at. Oh, and I do teach that. Oh, and I'm good at teaching that and Oh, it's okay for me to teach that. Oh, oh, right. It's that whole process. I think, like in a traditional school setting, they just sort of hand you the book and you go like, I can remember my first year teaching like thinking like I can't believe they left me alone in this room like with all these children. Here, how did I go so wrong? But like you, you sort of go like, well, I have a certificate I'm allowed to be here and in business like They give you you, they go like, Okay, do what you want. And then you're like, well, but can I get like a book or certificate? Or? Like, can I? Um, what? And then you know, but you do have to step into that like, language of what you're good at, knowing your superpowers, being able to articulate them and being able to be like, Oh, no, yeah, these are mine. Yeah, that's, that's the thing.

 

It's so much about owning it. And, um, when I did the PERT, when I initially did the program for UMap, it was only an adult program and the woman who designed it, it, she has a, she wrote a book, she had so much feedback that she has now designed a UMap youth program and a UMap teen program. So what I do with my middle school girls, is I say, Hey, we're going to take a bunch of assessments together. And they get the early version of UMap. So they in their middle school years when they are so searching for identity, they are getting language at that point. And having that foundation to go, oh, yeah, I remember these are my strengths. And and then of course, you can move on to the adult version of that. And, you know, their snapshots in time when you take those assessments, of course, you change and develop and grow. But it's so nice to have that. Have that report to go back to So yes, I did it as an adult. But now I get to implement it with, with the girls I work with to

 

well, and I think what's really interesting there is one of the things I have clients say to me all the time, is they'll go like, Well, yeah, of course, you know, I'm good at that. But like everybody knows how to do that. And you're like, and I am constantly like you've no Actually no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, lots of people are not good at that. And like I have one that coaches people on making decisions, because she just like makes decisions. They just she just does. She's like, well, but what do you mean, people don't do that. Don't do that. So I think something like that, that you do, especially with middle school girls is it's like you have these strengths. And the other thing they get to see is other people have different ones. So the things that are yours are special, they are yours. And they're valuable. Because your friend over there, your friend over there doesn't keep track of time ever. Like my best friend from high school. I when we have we all have friends. We're like if I paid her $50 Maybe on time, but likely still a little late. And I love her anyways, but I'm five minutes early to everything. Like this is how we roll. And that's just her. But she also knows people that are like wickedly on time, so she knows I'll be there it will be fine.

 

Right? Like, yeah, it um, one of the things that I really, really love when I bring the moms into the conversation because mom has a UMap too, right? The lens that she's looking through, could be completely different for me, you know, I'm looking at my UMap one of my strengths is individualization, which is like this ability to see the unique gifts and qualities in people. No, race is great.

 

way man.

 

And my husband happens to have one that is all about being equal and even and fair. So when we have conversations, sometimes you can see where the conflict is, is because he's seeing that through, you know, his strengths, which is this, you know, very fair, even equal. Look at things and I'm like, oh, but you know, my famous line is it depends. Right? Cuz I'm always like, it depends on the person and he

 

wants to slap you silly. He's like, doesn't depend.

 

Depend. There's a process. There's, you know, so I'm being able to be a bridge and translate multiple people in when when you're working on a team if you're in business, having that understanding of what everybody is bringing to the party or in your family if you're all still on teams.

 

Yup, well, advice. We joke right now my strength in my household. My daughter turned 10 This week is to go yes. Yes, you are absolutely entitled to your feelings and I appreciate that you have them You don't get to do is take them out and other people. Yes, you're entitled to your feelings? Absolutely, absolutely. I'm sorry, you're feeling that and you don't get it like I buy mine is to like, pull my Zen in and just be like, I taught middle schoolers, I can do this, like, I get that this is a phase, I'm going to not let my head explode.

 

Yes, depress. You press.

 

So talk to me about your business side journey. Because like, I want to know, your favorite part first. And I want to know the thing that you're just like, business.

 

Yes, yeah. So, you know, my, my, quote, teaching really came at Girls on the Run. And by the way, I only had kids for 90 minutes, and I had the same thought you did have like, someone's gonna let you do this for 90 minutes with their

 

kids. Okay,

 

we're doing it. And I have no teaching degree and no, like special tricks up my sleeve that all these teachers do. Um, so yes. Okay. So my career really started out in business, I went into commercial real estate. And I was thrown into corporate, you know, USA. But what was really interesting is the company that I went to work for very large company, national presence, but we were in charge of individual buildings. So they were like, individual businesses. And I got to be part of several individual buildings. At the same time, what translated into was when I went to work for Girls on the Run, again, national presence, nonprofit, which was very different commercial real estate. However, it's still business, it's still income and expenses, it's still presenting your product to the world, um, and marketing and sales, it doesn't matter that it's profit or nonprofit. And so again, it Girls on the Run very national presence, but local, local operations. So I was able to kind of translate what I did in real estate. Yeah, I have all this structure and resource of the national company, but I'm really running like my own little show here. And so when I decided to leave Girls on the Run, I had this idea of the structure and the foundation yet running it for myself. So um, the thing that I love, probably the most is the creativity behind it. That I think has, I've, I've always been looking for that, and betting on my creativity, betting that I had what it took to be an entrepreneur. Um, and knowing that I had some really great experience and skills. And then I'd have some challenges because I have a bunch of strengths. And on the flip side, there are some weaknesses, and some skills that you know, aren't exactly my cup of tea. Um, so if you asked me what my favorite thing was, I would say the creativity. And yeah, the freedom, of course, to individualize everything. You're

 

like, Listen, I'm gonna do it this way. And for you, we're gonna do it like this. And for you, I'm going to do it like this. And we'll just do all this individualization and screwed clock.

 

It's so much fun, but I will say in the background, there's this general structure of here, all the things that I want to teach know exactly how I deliver it to each girl that I work with changes a little bit, of course, depending on where you map as well. Um, so that is really, really fun for me, it can get a little overwhelming. Um, and I think that that's probably on the flip side, one of the more challenging things is, and it's one of the reasons why I love following you the structure, the process, the you know, all the all the all of the charts. No wonder, you know, and I do pay attention to, hey, I don't have that. And I'm going to collaborate with someone who does. Because I know that, yeah, I need that to be successful. And I know, that's not my thing, and that's okay.

 

So I'm gonna ask you a silly question in the middle of this, and I'll tell you why in a second. Um, I don't know if you've seen this anywhere before. One of my favorite things that I've ever seen in a professional development was this person. We all walked in, we sat down in this auditorium and this woman said to us, okay, Look at the charts, there are four walls for charts. One was a circle, a giant circle. One was a square. One was a triangle and one was like a squiggly line. And she went, go stand by your chart. And we all went. Well, which ones which she goes, you already know. Go stand by your chart. So which one would you go stand by?

 

Oh, for sure. This squiggly line.

 

You know what's really funny about that? So which one do you think I'm going to stand by? Wait,

 

let me let me think about that. Maybe I would be the circle.

 

No, you'd be the squiggly line. Yeah, yeah. No, your first instinct is exactly spot on there. All right, but like, what am i What's your guess? Wait,

 

what are the what are the circles? Squiggly lines?

 

dryers square?

 

Ooh, triangle.

 

Oh, no, I have a square square and a hair. Okay.

 

I thought so that was like, you know, when you take a test and and you're like, Oh, I talked myself out of it. I you know, you're like, that's too easy. And then yes,

 

yes. So she did this. And we all went and stood and there were some people who like stubbornly stood in the middle of the room. Some people that stood between them just like I'm both of these things. But like the squiggles were the creative people. They were the out of the box thinkers, they were the I'm going to do this my way. I'm going to do this this way. The circles are the feelers like the right the like, the like checking on everybody's feelings all the time. The squares are the process people. Right? I am a process kind of soul. And then the triangles were like the, the like, Go forth and conquer. Right?

 

Oh, okay, write it.

 

But it was really interesting how like, she could get all these people in this room. And she went like, you know what yours is? And we were like, alright, but it is really interesting that like, so now I actually look at people as I talk with them. And I think like, what's her shape? Like, and I have some friends, I have a friend who joked with a joke when she was like, I need your square. And you need my circle. Like, she's such a feeler. And sometimes I'll message her and be like, but I hate all the VMA eggs. She'll be like, listen, process person, give me some process. And it's about like connecting those. Finding people in your world, that are a balance to you in your strengths where you can be like, like, I need the feelers in my world to be like, have some, it's okay to have all these feelings. These feelers will be like, love you. They're the people, they're like, do you want to hug them? Like, don't touch me? Good God. And, and at the same time, like, it's good, you know, what your shape sort of is naturally. So that like I'm constantly working on like routing my square edges a little bit to be a little less.

 

Square swear about the whole thing? Yeah. So I have had, um, when you say that, it's one of those things where Clifton Strengths, you know, basically says, put your effort behind your strengths. When you do that you're gonna grow exponentially. And yes, you can put effort behind the things that aren't as strong. And I don't even like the word weaknesses. But, um, you can do that. But it's never going to produce that that exponential return result when you do your strengths. And so there's that appreciating, like rounding out a little bit. But then for me, I'm like, oh, but Sarah, the process? It's no wonder you're successful. Like, I'm excited about your process. I have no process. You know, I broke about I have no process. And so when I see you, I think that's the most amazing thing I've ever seen is how her brain works. Because I know mine doesn't. And I don't make it mean that I can't be a successful. Yeah, it's just going to be a different route.

 

Well, and I think that that's one of the things I've had to come to that, like I work with clients to come to that like. And we were so people don't know, Renee and I were in this mastermind group together last year, this time last year, and it was this group of very powerful women that sometimes was like, like, you want to just go sit on your desk and be like, I don't know what I'm doing here. I don't know if I fit but it was interesting to be able to look around that room and be like, well, maybe I should do it more like that. And I like did a little of that early on. And then also and I caught myself in like oh wait, the only version of this that works is mine. Like the only version of this that works his mind, the only version that works for you is yours. So like, I've been talking to clients a lot about, right for you versus right for all, like, time blocking is great if it works for you. And if you time block and then close your calendar and never look at it again, work for you. That's the, it's just not the right strategy. It's theoretically agree, like, I have a very good friend. She's like a Trello junkie, like Trello, like she has a problem. And she's always like, right, but you could make a Trello board. Actually, I can't, it makes me want to claw my eyeballs out. Like I just I can't it doesn't it's not right. For me, that doesn't mean it's a bad tool, or I don't have clients that love it, but I can't like the little boards close, and I can't see what's under there. And then I forget everything,

 

but it's hopeless. Yeah, I and I feel that way, when when you look at creating a business, you know, people will say, Well, you know, do it yourself, so you can see how it's done. And I think there are certain things that there's a ton of value in it, for me, like website building. So I just decided that that was not a place that I was going to spend time and still have eyelashes and eyebrows, and maybe, amen. Um, and because of prior work experience, I knew who I needed to go call and talk to, and it's still working progress, because, you know, words, um, but, uh, but knowing that and just making that decision from sufficiency and like, that's, it's okay, it's okay not to have it like, be at all, do it all learn at all. And in the first six months of business, well, and

 

also like, if you look around, and you go, I'm really strong at these things. And it would be like the most painful thing I've ever done for me to do web development, then it's a good use of your strengths to outsource it. Like it simply is just not a huge thing. That doesn't mean you're not going to have it like I have a with my book. I'm great at putting the things in, I can make a chart. What I like fundamentally cannot do is make it pretty, and I know this. So I did like a Sarah version of that, which was like I was like, Okay, pretty good. And then I sent it to my dear friend who was a graphic designer, and she turned it back. And I was like, Oh, this is what it looks like when a grown up does it? Got it? Like this is what someone who knows what the heck they're doing does Oh, right. Like, that's right. That's why I asked for help here. Because I don't know how to do this. And it would legitimately take me 100 years. And so there's working in that frame, right of like, you can do business your way. From a what matters, how you focus how your tone is, who you work with how you talk about it, but like the moving parts of it, you can do or you can ask someone else to do like, none of that matters.

 

Yeah, and I, um, when I was in real estate, it was always a question of what is the highest and best use of this land. So if we would come upon a development, you know, with an old crappy building, so what's like the highest and best use of this piece of property? And I think about myself that way. Yeah, um, and as far as my time is concerned, I'm sure a lot of your listeners are very busy. And multitasking and doing all of the things and allowing yourself to just do you outsource, like you said, and that allows you to really keep going and get some good momentum. So it's not, you know, it's just, it doesn't need to be painful.

 

No, and I think the question I ask all the time is like, I have an ongoing list, like I think we all do, it's over here on the side. I always ask like, A, which thing is most important right now? And be is this actually moving me forward today? Oh, yeah. Because if it's if I like even start to pause, if you go like, is this moving me forward today? And you go up, the answer's no. Anything but yes. Is No. Like any hesitation? Maybe maybe is no, like, because there is something on your list. That's Yes. If you're picking go do the one that you're like, oh, yeah, that one. It's probably the one that's been on your list for three days because you're saying that I don't want to do that. That's uncomfortable.

 

Yes. And there's uncomfortable because of that, you know, doubt in the putting yourself out there and who should I send it? Does it sound Oh, you know, come all the comparison and all of those things or it's you know, it's like I said that you know the stuff that you're just really not good at. So the stuff that feels really uncomfortable, but you know, you can get done. That's where some gold is.

 

Well, and I think it's like, is it uncomfortable? Because you're really you don't know how to do it? Or is it uncomfortable because you're judging it in some way you're like candy coating it with a nice lovely Shino judgment. And, like, I think of it all the time, like, what we know how to do is, is the chocolate in the middle of the Cadbury egg and or the m&m. And what we think other people think about it is the nice candy coating shell of judgment and doubt and worry and crap that we have to get through to get to the inside. And we layer that on ourselves friends, like we do that to ourselves. It's like, what are they gonna think of me when I send this message? I don't know, I guess I will have to send it to find out.

 

Yeah, and, and recognizing when you're making progress with that, and I'll show you this. So I do this journal with the girls that I work with. And I literally send them stickers with stars. And I

 

mean ours on my desk, like legitimately right over there. You

 

know, I'm like, listen, let's find all the star moments from the weak because they're in there. And we just need to go look for him. And and you don't even realize how much progress you've made. You know, I remember trying to send out my first email to say, Hey, I'm a life coach and my palms sweating and hitting sand and like, hovering over the button. Um, and you know how far I've come? Sure, there are plenty more things that are in are truly uncomfortable now, like, you know, podcasting first time. Um, but when I look back, I think oh, you know, podcasting was like on my, kind of on my bucket list. So here I am. Did does it. You know, did it look exactly how I thought it was gonna be in the plan, then the whole thing? No, but it happened. And I'm gonna get myself a star today for

 

like, Yeah, well, I like that. There's a game, a game, a game. I think of it as a game that I play with clients sometimes. And I'll ask them to when we're in the like, nothing is working. Everything is evil. I don't make any progress. I'm never gonna get anywhere I go. Okay, great. Where were you a year ago today? And then they go like, well, and I'm like, What did you What have you learned since? And we they like, move around? Okay, where were you two years ago today? And then it's like, well, two years ago today, and we think a little bit and then we go to five, and then we go to 1010 years ago today. I had a let's see. 12345 deal, baby. Oh my gosh, she turned 10 this week. I mean, this owning businesses was not even a thought I had. I was in my second year out of the classroom in a corporate role. And I had just started maternity leave. I didn't know what the hell which side was up. I didn't know anything. Like I didn't. We were sleeping like and like basically tents in our living room. So I was afraid she'd get cold in our bedroom. Like, I mean, I had all the problems. But like, you know, I've come you start to like, widen the lens a little bit. And all of a sudden, you're like, oh, look what I need. You're like, oh, I kept this human alive. I kept another human alive. I built cheap businesses. And now I help other people. Oh, I guess it's not all that bad.

 

Yeah, and, and sometimes, unless someone asks you the question, you discount dismiss it, it's so easy to bypass all of it and be like, it's just, I haven't done enough. That list is so so long. And and I again, having somebody pause and say, Hey, let's just recap what's been happening here. And you can see the light bulbs, you know, a little going off above their heads. And I think that that is it's a practice that we don't teach early enough. And that's one of the reasons why. You know, when I'm Coach Rene, which is still so funny to me, I didn't play I thought you know, I didn't play any sports growing up so whenever someone says coach, Rene, I'm seriously like you told me it's been a solid oh, five years.

 

Yeah, but younger guy. Well, it's one of those reasons like internally chuckle and you go Yeah. She He, so tell me tell me, for the people that are in the like, Okay, I started I'm in it, I'm moving.

 

Oh my god.

 

They're in the I started this Oh God, what did I do phase of business which was like, I don't know, three or four months after you started then you're like your like enthusiasm is starting to wear off and you're like, Oh Jesus, what did I do? Like when you're getting to the Oh Lord, what did I do phase? What do you want people to know?

 

Um, gosh, that's that's a good question. Um, what do I want people to know? Um, rest is actually super important.

 

So hard. It's like telling a new mom to sleep though, isn't it? It's like, evil.

 

That is a brilliant, brilliant analogy, because you just you really don't believe it. And then you eventually hit a wall. You know, play with burnout. Think about quitting. And what did I do, you know, go through this whole thing only to go okay, I just needed to get a good night's sleep.

 

Well, in like, it's like, literally, you invited burnout over for a playdate like, like, seriously, like it is you literally play with it, you're like, burnout. Let me juggle you like, I It's so insane. But I think that rest, I had somebody say to me once, like rest belongs on your to do list. It's literally an item on your list that you get to do. It's a, an it's like, not a thing that you do when all your to dues are done. It is a To Do in and of itself. And I was like, oh, oh,

 

oh. And my brain is like, that's radical. For real. And I've had to teach it, you know, yes, rest is productive. Rest actually allows you to be more creative, which is the thing that you want most, um, so rest and pacing yourself. Because, you know, we talk about like, there's not better than here, right? So we've switched jobs, we've decided to do this entrepreneurial thing. And we think, Oh, the flexibility is going to be amazing. We think the creativity is going to be amazing. We think, you know, doing things on our own is just going to be this amazing experience. And while it is it still has its challenges.

 

Oh, and I think we kind of expected to feel amazing 100%. And then when it doesn't, you're like, oh God, something's wrong. It doesn't feel great today. But yep, it doesn't. That yeah, I will, I

 

will say this, it's a different kind of challenging, I think we can all agree, you know, you're just switching out one thing for the next, um, but I do think when you are more aligned with the work that you want to be doing in the world, whether it's your values, or your strength, or your skills, that alignment does feel so satisfying. So, in theory, the challenges are there, and you can tackle them, because at the end of the day, you're doing the work that you really, really want to be doing. Yeah, and, you know, so to me, that alignment piece has been really, really crucial. And again, after this, like, you know, after the honeymoon phase you know, that, you know, going to get Starbucks that, you know, 245 Cuz you're going to do whatever, you know, and go into Costco at whatever time you want to, um, those are all great things.

 

Funny, I had a client say to me this week, she said, well, but you know, I always feel like I need to work at night on those days that I had like an appointment during the day or something because I didn't work a full day. I was like, hold on, back up. She was like, what? Well, you know, I have to like make up that time. And I was like, according to who actually. And she was like, well, but like my work day and I was like, I'm gonna ask you again. Like I love you according to who? Who says, and she was like wool, but I mean, that's what a workday supposed to be. And we had we went like six rounds. Because she was just like, Wait, why? And I was like, Well, hold on who's the boss? She was like I am and I was like, well, who's that's the workday she was like, Oh crap. I was like, yeah, man, like you want to go to Costco in the middle of the day. Your boss says it's cool. Like do you if you don't like there is no like Time clock there is no somebody checking off like, which things did you get done today? Because if you didn't sit here for eight hours, you didn't do it right. Like to to go not only start a business for the flexibility, but then actually use it as a whole thing. And not feel bad about it.

 

Right? Yeah. Oh, that's huge. That's huge. And and saying like, it's okay. And I think to one of the things that I've, I've found myself doing is literally redefining every thing that things like that, that come up, like, who says, this is the right way to write an email? Who says, this is your you know, this is how your client call has to go on and redefining that? And of course, you evaluate, you know, is it working? Is it not working. But the idea that you get to redefine everything.

 

And I think like, the other thing that happens is we're like, right, but those people who are experts at it know what to do. And this is how they said to do it. And like I'm on board for that, because like I was a math teacher, there are lots of research based math teacher things that happen in a classroom. But what you also do is you look at the kids in front of you, you look at how you are as a teacher, you look at the structure of your room, and your building and their other things, and you take all those factors, and you mush them in with the research and you do a version of it. And what happens in business is somebody says, well, but it works if you do it like this, and we're like, well, then they have to do it. She says, No, does it feel like me? And then you're like, well, but it didn't work for me. Well, yeah, you're because it didn't work for you. You human have to push it around and make it your version of the recipe. But it's that like, trying to be like, well, but this is what the expert said.

 

I think one of the things that I will say is giving yourself permission to be an expert on you. Oh, yeah. Yeah. And that, um, that isn't something that I was taught. You know, I really, I had to learn it and, and make sure that that like, it's this is this is permission to be an expert on me. Oh, I noticed that. Right. After I go to the gym, I have all the ideas for the things that I want to write for the day. And I literally sit in my car and give myself you know, 3045 times an hour. I mean, I'm like sitting there, and I'm sure people are walking by going, What is she doing? And I'm like, I'm in it. I'm writing it. And it's good. So guess what? That's how it's gonna roll today.

 

Yeah, no, I do that I have ideas. I tend to have ideas for things right at like 715 at night. So my kids will be watching TV. And all of a sudden, it'll be like, oh, there it is. Like, there's that thing I've been trying to save for three days, but I couldn't quite grab, and it'll be in the notes section on my phone. And the next day, I'll be like, still here will give me like, I'll use it the next day or in the next couple of days. But they just like, it's like when you take a minute and you you went to the gym, you took your brain out of your business for a while. I was talking to a client about this recently, she was like, well tell me about your workouts. And I was like my workouts. I was like, honestly, I work out so that I can turn my brain off. And she was like, Wait, tell me more. Because, like, that's part of it for me is exercise and fitness and all of that for me as a business owner is a place to go and turn off my brain and let it all work in the background where I am not like even able to think about it. And then when I turn it back on, it's like oh, well, some of those things gelled together and some interesting ways Look at this. That's where my and that's why I get things at 17 Because I've been feeding my kids dinner I've been helping people do the things and then we sit down they start watching TV and like my brain goes boom, there it is. Hi. Rest taking

 

Yeah. Well and for me, you know the the mind body thing is, is so huge. And Girls on the Run does such an amazing job of saying, Hey, we're gonna take this physical activity and we're gonna blend it with this social emotional learning. And it's there's also all kinds of research behind it is that when you're moving and then you're able to absorb and learn and hold on to it even longer. You know, that's where some serious magic happens where you know, I think it's one of those things where when we're sitting at a desk all day going, come on, come on, you can do it you can get you can get it you got you know, it just got Keep going, stepping away and doing something. I'm a huge fan of TED lasso. So if I pull up like a couple clips of something funny from the show, or even Saturday Night Live, like I love all that stuff. And I'll sit there and watch it for a few minutes. And it's just a little bit of a release of my brain to have some fun laugh a little bit, relax, and then I come back and go, oh, oh, yeah. Okay, I got it. Yeah,

 

I did. I was fixing my website. This is and then we get to, but I was doing something on my website a couple weeks ago, and I was like, bit literally like banging my head on my desk. I was like I was and then. And I was like, fine, because my computer walked away, like had a little tantrum out in the kitchen, like to the whole, like, what and read my book for a little while, sitting on the back patio. And I was all sudden, I was like, I was doing that the hardest way possible. Oh, like all sudden, I was like, Oh, I Oh, oh, I came back. And I sat down. It took me like, literally 10 minutes to fix and be done with and I was like, Oh, I didn't really need to bang my head against the wall. I really needed to walk away. Yeah, lessons here kids, don't del problem. Alright, so Renee Grady, tell me who should call you right now. Besides me, and all the middle school girl mobs, including them, but tell me who is right and how they get you.

 

You can find me on Instagram, @rippleeffectlifecoach, that is the primary place where I put my content. And that's the best way to find me, um, who should call me so Middle School moms that are kind of pulling their hair out watching their girl enter these middle school years. And they know that they need, they need skills, they need help, they need support, and they just can't figure out how to get that for their girl. And the mom route is not necessarily working. And that's super, super common. Um, so I, I come in and say a ton of the things that the moms are saying, but in a different way and presented in a different way. And we have some fun with it. And we talk about some uncomfortable things. And so the girls get what they need, because what we really see is in middle school, there are gaps in skills. They're just not there yet. But they don't necessarily want to hear it from mom, caregiver dad. And so those moms who are really looking to fill those gaps, those are the moms that are ready. And the girls also have to be on board. That is one of the signature things of coming to work with me. Yeah, it's, uh, you know, it's kind of awkward at first. But, um, I have yet to find a girl that I don't connect with on some level. So, um, the girl has to be willing and open. And then we just take it from there.

 

Yeah, well, it makes such a difference. Like I, my girls, not a middle schooler yet, but we have already had our things where I had to be like, okay, and I like I have a teaching degree. I worked with middle schoolers, I've worked with kids and all the ages. I've done all of this, like, I haven't, like I have a head start on a lot of people. And I was on and I went like, Oh crap. Like I am. I was like, we I don't know what. Like, also, my daughter and I are a lot alike. And in that I know exactly what's happening her little brain sometimes. And it's like, ah, and so my temperature like it's just there's all the things mixed up. And so, you know, having someone else have the conversation made such a difference. It was really like it makes a huge difference and as much as you're like, right, but I should be able to do this. No, you shouldn't. Like they truly you shouldn't like that's not how this is they're trying to separate from you. That's what the lady finally had to be like she's trying to separate from you. So your voice is not what she wants here. Like, Oh,

 

got it. Truth. And I have I have a 15 Almost 16 year old daughter and I'm right there as a parent too. So I really I relate on both ends. Which can be really helpful as well.

 

Yes, I bet ___ like Oh, yep. knew this was gonna happen and still can't do anything bad like crap. Ah, Renee greedy. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for doing this with me. I know this was a new experience for you. I'm so excited about it. With us, I am just so happy you are here with us today.

 

Thank you so much. This has been great. And, um, I just think what you do for teachers in the business world is so, so needed. And gosh, teachers just have so much to offer.

 

Truth. So with that, if you want to go find Renee, I will link her Instagram in the transcript notes for this if you need me. You can find me in my Facebook group FB Group, which is Teachers in Business or you can send a message and we can talk about coaching because you know what, sometimes we all need coaching, even the things that we're like, no, no, but I should have this and having someone else in your world in your corner to do it with you makes a difference all the way around, no matter if you're navigating the teenage years, which God I'm literally going to move into the brain. So let your husband know in a couple years we will be there with all our stuff. And in your business. Like you don't have to do any of this alone. There's a whole world here for you. So we will see you all next week.