Teaching, Coaching, and Magic with Stacey Andon

Stacey Andon, Life and Business Coach: 

Website: https://www.staceyandon.com/

FB Group (Unlock Your Mid-Life Magic): https://www.facebook.com/groups/326010807894352

Freebie: https://www.staceyandon.com/create-your-circle-of-magic/

Welcome, welcome to the next episode of Teachers in Business. I have lost track of the numbers at this point. I want to say that this is going to be 38 but I don't know. I'm too excited. That's why because my friends Stacey is here, Stacey Andon I was gonna do it wrong and I did it right is a life and business coach who is it says expert here in her bio, but she's more than that. I'm gonna just editorialize her bio because it's it's way under selling her wonderfulness. She does help you navigate midlife meltdowns, that is the truth of it. And is all about helping you find clarity in all the things you're doing and using your intuitive gifts to do it, to make it easier to make it more fun and really, to find your way into yourself in a way you don't even know is there. So the in her bio it says imagine make waking up to feel your life feeling like you won the lottery, the life lottery, this is the truth. I like that part. I'm gonna keep that one. This is what she does with people. But she was also a teacher because so many of the most wonderful people on earth started their careers the teacher in this is one of my teaching friends. So Stacey Stacey, welcome, welcome.

Thank you so much. I know it is I always say teachers are the most amazing beings on the planet. Of course, I'm wholly biased. Completely. Um, but and I always said, we make excellent entrepreneurs and people in business, because there's so much I know, I learned when I especially like looking back on my teaching experiences like oh my gosh, when people are like, how do you know how to do this? And how are you confident and this sounds like everything I feel like goes back to what I learned and all the experience and all the mess ups with a bunch of 14 year olds for almost 10 years.

Well, and nothing teaches you to fail forward, like teaching the truth of it. So let's start here, I tend to start people in a very similar place to talk to me about how you define teacher and in what it means to be a teacher in your, in your view of the world. Because I think so often we define teacher as person that taught in classroom in school building, and yes, you've done that, but I don't think that's the whole of it. So talk to me about what your version of teacher means?

That's a really good question. And it's interesting, because when I was five, I proclaim to the world I mean, a lot of people were listening, that I was a teacher, I didn't know anything, like I mean, I knew my teachers in school, but my family, nobody was a teacher, I proclaimed it, this is what I am here to do on the planet. And when I started very traditional path, right, becoming a more traditional teacher. At that point, always I felt like it's my role to help every student that comes through first of all be seen, to know that they matter. I think, above all else, all of the other content or whatever else we're facilitating, it's seeing each other. And teachers have such an intimate relationship, right? We, we we get to be in people's lives, students lives, clients lives in ways that most people are not. And so I think there's, there's an intimacy there and teaching that probably gets overlooked or not spoken about. And I also truly believe and as I've kind of morphed into, maybe our grown into this teaching through the coaching lens, we're here to help people really remember who they are what's true for them. And I used to think a teacher's like, oh, here's the information they need to master. This is what they need to know. And then I realized like, No, it's nothing about that. I read a statistic one time that 80% of everything we learn in school and college, you everywhere. You You lose 80% which is probably even higher now. Though, I would just go before the internet, Well, not really. But you know, maybe like, so it's probably even higher than that, like maybe retain 5%. And so what matters at the end of the day, if they are diagramming a sentence or know what a noun or a verb is, right? If you're talking about students, that doesn't matter to me. What matters is how you communicate, how you communicate who you are, how you share that how you show up in your life, how you live your purpose. To me teachers are like the highest calling, because it's not that we want to create a bunch of mini bees. We want to create The next generation or all of the generations to have permission to really show up as who they are, what they know and share that. So, um, that's my definition of teacher.

Well, and it's really this like, in their eye here, connectors and confidence builders and, and like it's not a factory like someone described it once to me like well, but teaching is telling like, yes, you have a that's not the definition of teaching that I walk around the world with. It's not me telling you anything. Teaching is about and you and I very much see eye to eye here about giving people permission and confidence to figure it out. Like I was always the I am still like the unpopular math nerd, I am popular with my students, in some ways because of this, but like anti popular programming that like I don't actually give a crap if you walk out being able to multiply, that's not the point. The point is, can you figure it out when you need it? Do you have the confidence to walk away and be like, I can figure this out? I do the same thing with clients like do you can you walk away and be like, I can figure this out, then that's that I don't care how you get there. I care that you get there.

And there's this practicality, I think you and I both also ascribe to it around tools, right how to help people get there so that when they embark on, you know, on their journey, their next step that may or may not include us, they have everything they need. And to your point, what I love too, is even if they don't think they have it or know it, right, they know how to your point, figure it out, or find it or use the resources like, to me that's such a powerful place to be. It's like I don't always know all the answers, which again, kind of maybe kind of taking away from traditional educational dogma. I love the I don't know, because it allows for us to be way more curious. and way more in the present moment, rather than taking what other people have said or whatever influences us. And like trying to adopt it as our own.

Yeah. 100% that's the end. That's the thing, like, the role of teacher is to help people figure out how to do that. Yeah, in whatever I do in math, you did it in English language arts, like we're friends anyways. All my best teacher friends are math teachers, I FYI. And understand, even still, were my god give lives you talk to me, what's the devil? But like it is that that ability to and you said it right out of the gate that like all of this applies to business. All of this applies to everything everywhere. Because if you get access to I can figure out how you can always figure out how like, that's the thing in here. Alright, so tell me you taught English language arts Tell me what you used to teach more than that, because there's some things in between. and then talk to me about Stacey's Hogwarts, and in all the way down the pike. So that to me one more time, because I want to make sure I understand. Talk to me about what you started out teaching. And then what you're teaching now, which is more even so than in your bio, the coaching part of it, like there's more there, that's fun. And I'm gonna make you talk about all the fun things here, because you were like, oh, but that's not we're gonna do the whole thing.

I'm with you. So as an English teacher, my biggest thing that I wanted to teach students was to be incredible communicators, and critical thinkers. So I, it doesn't matter to me, what if they read a comic strip or a book? or this or that? Can you read something? and have your own thoughts about it? What's the process of really taking something in and having your own independent thought? And how do you then express it out in the world? The number one thing in my entire opinion about all things is when we're in conflict, and when we're in a communication, because I'm making something mean something or I have some knowledge of something, and you come to the to the conversation with a completely different set of expectations or perceptions or that kind of thing. How do we communicate effectively, our ideas, how do we connect? How do we, again, make a convincing argument for something and not trying to, again, manipulate people but absolutely standard speak for the things we're for. So as an English teacher, I didn't care about standardized, it makes me cringe a little bit to say that If I didn't care about standardized tests, in, which was very much the pressure that was coming down the pike, still I taught a long time ago. And what I felt was great education, great teaching. If the test is well done, I don't need to teach to a test. I want to teach to life. I want to teach, you know, again, a 14 year old, how do you navigate the trickier parts of things of life? Rather than Hey, you read the canon, right? Of all the works of literature that, you know, somebody decided, was the best? No, let's get messy and expose ourselves to all different perspectives. Let's get super curious. And it's funny, because that thread, now that I'm sharing that with you goes through my entire your, my entire gamut is this curiosity and asking questions.

So how does it? How does that that curiosity, the asking questions, the like, learn to have your own thoughts about you and everything else and communicate them in a way that is both effective, but also not like, I'm right, you're wrong. You're a terrible person, like, whatever to think critically, to have your own jam? How it is that that experience in teaching, come all the way through today and what you do with people now, you know, it's so funny, I never thought about exactly like this. So this is a gift for me, too, is exactly what I'm doing with clients. Because what happens, most of my clients, right are in the middle of their lives. And they have gotten to the middle of their lives trying to follow all the rules. Oh, what does xx successful life look like? What is the world telling me, I need a degree, I need a nine to five job I need, you know, 2.5 kids and the dog and the wife, whatever all of that is that has been told to us somehow, again, curious learners, by the time we get to the middle of their lives, our lives, so many of us have really fallen in to the the systems of beliefs, the paradigms of other people's definition of success and what it means to live a really meaningful life and we forgotten about curiosity, we forgotten to ask questions. We know it's there where it's that like, that, like feels scary to ask because it's pushing up against even more so right? As we become adults, and we have responsibilities and all the things it pushes up against this. Like, can I give myself permission to do it a different way? To do it my way? I mean, that I think from almost every client I've ever worked with, they want that permission. Well, and it's also the like, people, like you and I who went when they were five years old, like I'm going to be a teacher. And you go into the teaching world, and you're like, this is exactly where I'm supposed to be. And then something happens, something changes. And you're like, Hmm, this is not where I am anymore. And it's like, whoa, hold on. I always knew what I was going to be. I know I'm not. And what happens like it's that so sometimes it's a matter of curiosity, because like I work with a lot of teachers, and they get halfway through and they think like, this doesn't fit me anymore. I have to find something that fits or I'm burned out or I'm tired or I'm all of these things. But like for me, we moved. And suddenly it was like I do something different. Now wait, hold on. What? One moment, please hold the phone, what's happening here in my life, where it was like, oh, where people have kids and then they don't go back? And it's like, oh, God now what am I? And it's that you bump into like, well, but if I'm not this then then what? Yeah, he I have an interesting theory about that. And I actually shared it at a women's conference a couple years ago. And the attendance the participants were highly interested in this thought I absolutely believe if you you have this cart, right this teacher energy, this feeling in your bones, it is you you we could you could put me in a Starbucks or you could put me in the bank, right if the drive thru, and I'm going to be asking people, how are you What's going on? What are you thinking about? I can't help myself. So we have these kind of 3d human wrappers of all like, it shows up as an English teacher right in eighth grade or it shows up as a college professor. It shows up in these different things. But ultimately, that's just the expression or The medium that we're playing with at the time, it's not actually aren't like, to me our life purpose is. I don't want to say like completely static because we do evolve and grow with it. However, I know in my bones, whatever I'm doing in the planet is going to be tied to exactly what I just said to you in terms of my definition of a teacher. Yeah.

Oh, and I that will happen. I'm sure people listening can relate to it, because you'll be doing something that is completely unrelated to teaching and you'll say something and people will go, what did you used to teach? Like, I get that sometimes people will be like, did you use would you what do you do? And they'll go like, Oh, yeah, okay. Or like I there's one in our our world that you and I both know who every now and then my Facebook feed will come like God such a teacher, what the hell? I'm sure I had a little rant about algebra as empowerment today on Facebook. So so I'm sure that that will get all the love of the Oxford comma. You right? Yeah, I Well, yeah, I got all kinds of fired up yesterday about algebra as a gatekeeper. And like I also that this morning, like her fell out. Talk to me about, we're gonna look at it in two ways, the challenges in business that you've come across, but I don't want to do that first. Because we don't all we don't lead with challenges. Forget that. Let's start somewhere. What is your favorite part about being in business as a teacher?

So here's the thing, I realized that not right away, but I realized it like maybe two years in and I was like, Oh, one of the things I think teachers do extremely well. Because basically, at least my experience of the teachers like, here's these 150, you know, students, here's what they need to have accomplished by the end of the year, go.

And do it. 150 ways because something different.

Exactly. And so what I found that I don't think everybody has, but I think a lot of teachers have this ability, big picture strategic thinking, Okay, where are we going? What are the goals? What is the vision, and then equally kind of like, again, I love to put things together that don't normally seem like they go together, you are also in charge of implementing all the actual right step by step processes. And, you know, what is it going to look like, once you've created the strategy. And I think being able to straddle both of those places, this is my one of my favorite things. I love to be a visionary. Okay, what do I imagine for my business? What do I feel? What do I see? And then it's like, and I also love to get in the details of things. It's like, oh, okay, are we doing a Facebook challenge? What are we doing? I'm doing, you know, I've got an in person event, I just like, all of these things that help people again, tied to how do you really get reconnected, if you felt disconnected from who you really are? why you're here on the planet?

Well, and it's that in business, it's that like, wait, why am I here? Wait, why am I here? Where are we trying to go? Where are we trying to go? compared to like, what am I trying to move forward today? Like, and you get to do both. But in a classroom and any sort of teaching setting, you are always doing both? It's like, okay, where are we ending up? And what am I doing today? And yes, there's a rabbit hole standing over there that I can go fall in, but we will never ever get where we're going. If we go fall in that rabbit hole two, three days in a row. Like, we can't keep doing that and get to that endpoint and sort of navigating those two pieces is like teachers do that incredibly well. Because like, I was talking to a friend the other day, she's like, well, but I just she's getting ready for a new school year. And she was like, Yeah, I have it all sort of mapped out through December. And I just laughed and I was like, yep, and that's actually I think something that's hard sometimes for teachers in business is we knew what we were doing every day and so this summer in retake my classroom, the English teacher, not so much well, but you knew you knew the broad strokes of it are sure sure you did. You knew more than you give yourself. And then you get into business and it feels like you can't know that. But you can. Yeah, right. It feels like it can't be possible because you don't know how all this works yet. But also you didn't know it when you're a second year teacher. Like it's the same kind of thing.

And there's something I think that first year teaching which we all know if you are a teacher, you know what I am talking about bringing you to your knees like maybe I need to change my tire time sick.

Yes, that is so helpful. it to me in business, that all of that because there was this perspective of like, Okay, my first year was really tough and there were moments that I wanted to quit and then My second year was so exponentially easier, right? Like and then you learn, you learn about yourself you learn about different methods like all of that has been helpful to remind me every year I'm in business that I can pull from all of that. And all the messing and flailing or the mess ups or whatever you want to call that. I think teachers and maybe I'm wrong about this, but at least for me, I have a high tolerance for like, Alright, that didn't work because I wouldn't think about all the times when I was in a classroom where the overhead projector now see I'm dating myself the overhead projector that this didn't work though that to like, nothing worked. And in the moment, all of a sudden, you had to be resourceful. So there's like this beautiful energy of resourcefulness. I think for all teachers that so feeds, teachers a minute I told a friend of mine years ago, it's like, coming to the business world is so much easier.

Well, because in the business world, like you get to be like, Okay, today didn't go to plan and a teaching world like you I have actually melted an overhead projector Personally, I have. And I believe that same day at a bird flight in an open window that was open like three inches into my classroom, I believe I did it all in one day. And the head custodian was like, what is happening in here today? We're like, but you you have all that go on, you want to throw in the towel and go take a nap. And there's still a bunch of humans looking you like what's next? And you're like, oh, Nikes not good. But I was talking to somebody about this the other day, like as a first year teacher, you you keep your nose above the water you try. And you're you screw it all up, all goes terribly wrong, I survive. It's okay. In the second year, you actually like stand on your feet, and you're like, oh, okay, you like find your sea legs a little bit. But by the third year, you're like, Oh, I might do something fun. Like I might be able to do something interesting. And then it just gets better. But business is the same. We look at it six months in and we're like, well, I'm still keeping my head above water. No. You are. Yes. Yes. And right. Like that people are like, right, but this is hard. Like, yeah, it is nothing is new. Like it's not. We have this expectation is wild. But in teaching, you're like, Oh, it's only your second year, you're okay. That's like like you've been in business two years. Harbor, you haven't figured it all out yet major million dollars like that.

So that reminds me, one of the things that I think is such a benefit, and it was the hardest. The hardest thing for me to do. When I walked away from being a teacher, the people that I worked with was I absolutely loved and adored them, like my family, you do have this kind of generally, this support system. I think one of the challenges were not that if we go into that space for a minute, is that as an entrepreneur and being in business, if you're by yourself, it's like, how do you create, then that's that support system for yourself? Because it can feel very isolating and alone, like in general, but for teachers work social, most of us are social creatures, right? We like to go into the faculty room and have a cup of coffee and see who's in there. At least that's what I did. And, and so when you start business, you can feel so you, you don't have that person, I had that person say it's your first year, don't where you got this, right, that person in business doesn't necessarily always exist unless you intentionally create that. So I would say, If you really love that support system, and I think entrepreneurs really need some of that. They need those reminders of like, it's okay, like, let's zoom out a little bit. And look at the bigger picture you will get through whatever this is.

Well it is that like, I was not necessarily always in the teachers room, but I had my people like you have your people that you can walk down the hallway and be like, you will never believe what just happened in my room. And what do I do with this? And dear god this day, like is it a full moon and a rainy Thursday? Like, what's going on here? And how like, right, like the kids get packs of candy in their pockets, day after house, please. Ouch. So it is that like that community building and I can remember the other time I felt this was as a brand new mom, I can remember and I like have this secret side mission that I run in my life where I truly, whenever one of my people in my extended circle has a baby, especially their first one. I'm like the person stalking them a little bit because I can remember feeling so very alone. We didn't really know a lot of people here like I didn't have I just I've never felt so by myself with and with a screaming human on Cuz all she did was cry. And so it is that same kind of thing. And eventually I was like, Oh, I have to find people, like I mean people, but I like, secretly have made it my mission like none of my friends of friends should ever have to feel that. So I'm always like, Hi. How are you? What do you do and everything, okay want to talk what have a conversation with a human that doesn't care if your baby screaming like, but it's the same thing. And we, but there are people here out in the business world, they're like, I need people to let's make friends.

Like you're having a coach, right? It's the perfect thing for for anybody at teachers to to have that coach in their corner, that absolutely cat like to me, a coach can remind you of all these things, and hold the space. And it's like, ah, I think everybody on the planet could benefit, right? You don't have to have a coach. But who wouldn't want somebody to really be able to help you navigate and facilitate your own growth and learning and knowledge, and also really to be that safe place. And that place when, again, everything's going wrong, and you feel like you're the only one out on the planet to have the person that's like, Come closer, I got you.

Well, and actually the other thing that I found really helpful early in my business, when I started working with the one on one coach I had is the other thing I got from her from being in her world where other people in her world. So like I would go to her events and do her things. And then slowly like I actually had a conversation with two yesterday we meet every other week. One will be on the podcast and a couple weeks one will be on shortly thereafter. But they are people that I know because I was in her world. And we now serve each other like that is I got the benefit of the coaching which I really needed, which I needed to get out of my own way. Because honestly like we all get in our own way. And you're like, Oh, you know where the problem is your be? Hi, I am the problem where you're like, oh, what's the problem? I am oops. And you need your I needed help to get out of that. But the added benefit for me and I know I've been able to introduce clients to other clients to sort of build them a network is to be able to say to people look, or be introduced to other people that you're like, well, I can remember she the coach I was working with did a live at some point. And one of the other women and I were going back and forth in the comments and she was like you too. She's like you too are meant to be friends. Go Go Go for it. Like we're like, okay, let's be friends. And sure enough we are. But like we're busy. We we talk business, we talk life, we do all those things. But that community goes a long way. I think that that's a big deal.

That's true. Luckily, years ago, when I first started my business, I was out networking, right? Because we all do and I remember time and time again people said to me, Stacey, there's a lot of places like to go stand up and give your like one minute pitch right? And and then ask for referrals. But there's not a community where you can actually work on your business, like talk about your business, talk about your your the things you're most proud of talk about the things that have got you kind of sideways. And it was interesting. Um, I decided after I'd been in a networking group that had folded, I was like, You know what, I'm going to create the thing that I keep hearing over and over and over again. And it was a variety of different entrepreneurs. And, and people in different actually, it didn't matter to me whether you're an entrepreneur, but it was like a place for you to be able to come and have that community is such an important piece. I think that we don't probably intentionally think about right when we're starting a business or as we're in business, I would say What's your dream team look like? Right? What are the people like if you're creating community support your coaches in there, maybe your accountant is in there? Maybe your your, you know, your trader, your massage therapists? What are the things that you are doing to really take exceptional care of yourself? Because I also think that teachers do not. They are right, they are the epitome sometimes of burnout, because they put everybody else above their own needs. And one of the things when I left teaching was like, there has to be a different way. There has to be a way where we can take really good care of ourselves, not burnt out. Although I will say when I go back and do staff development for teachers now, they all look at me like this guy for a good five minutes. Go and I tell them that I want to challenge them to change that. And I do get a little street cred because I taught so that helps me soften that idea. But that is also very prevalent idea that I think we as teachers, and just again, people on the planet, can't take it to take into our business that doesn't serve us. So well. Oh my gosh, if I was working 80 hours a week, right? It teaching grading papers doing this lesson planning, right? Like, I should be doing that in my business and what I find for myself personally and for others, like that's the fastest way to hate your business. And the thing about it, I think that's really important about that is like the whole point, if you left teaching, because you were burned out to go into business, the whole point was to have it be different. Not the same. Like it was not to go back to banging your head on your desk, like that's not.

Do you think we can just kind of almost inadvertently, because we don't really examine the thoughts and, and our patterns? I think we can like cuz I did it. And I didn't want it either. And it was like, wait, I find myself in this grind. What am I doing?

Right? Well, and then it's, you know, it's funny, I wrote a post last week about how like, I sat on Friday, I sat down at my desk, it was like, 9:17 my brain was like, You are so late. And I was like, Dude, what they paid. Now I hear it's right there was like, Where's the rag? I at this point, I've thought about it enough to be like, Oh my god, are you kidding me right now? Yeah, I'm late. And I'm getting up at two. Like, and I'm out early. So what, what it but it was, you know, my brain offered like you were supposed to be here at 830. And you don't get out till four. And I was like, oh my that's, that's very interesting of you. Thank you. Because I don't have to live on that schedule. That's that's the point of this. So I know. And it even though we say what we want, I think there there is a little bit of work there to break out to be more intentional to break those patterns. And like you said, when the thought comes up, it's like, all right. thinking like,

Oh, my God, I am late. I feel the same way about Fridays. Because after I left teaching, I worked in the corporate world for 10 years. So I went into HR and development, again, teaching in the business. I did the same and what I remember a Friday afternoons, especially in summer, my work would be done. And I we I worked in a company culture that did not let you leave, even if your work was done, you had to stay till five o'clock. And I can remember like, from four to five was the most painful hour of my life, especially in the summers on a Friday afternoon at work. And so one of the things I remember saying to myself is like I am having whatever I want to do on Friday, is what I'm doing. And I still every once in a while get that it's almost like an echo like you said, right of like, What do you mean, you're like going to lunch? But the more fun I actually have the more break some of those old? Yes.

And it's not to say like give up working for a week and Exactly. But But if you need to go do that, like I can remember my first boss when I went to Britannica, he early on, I don't remember what happened. And he was like, dude, you work 3000 miles, however many miles away, he was like, you get all your stuff done. I don't give a flying, whatever. When it happens, he's like, do what you want. And I was like, I don't compute this. What is my brain was like, but but but I have a ballot eight, four, and what's happening right now. And he was like, whatever man, do you I was like, it's almost like the gender, right? Because we defer our power and our agency and our sovereignty to things outside of ourselves to teachers do. And so it's like, we have to claim that for ourselves. Like this idea. It's interesting to me even to it's like I don't look at like, just the hierarchy while I'm a teacher and you're the student or you're the client and saying no, absolutely. You know, what is best for you. And you know what, but we haven't been dipped in that world, right? We've been in a world that is very much trying to tell us the, the opposite of that. So it It is almost like a radical departure, at some point. Not that it always looks like a big, you know, gesture, but a radical departure, to really be able to say, Oh, I can do this however I want and you're right. I think people we've been been told to be afraid that if we just Oh, if you just decide you're gonna have fun on Friday, you're gonna eat bonbons all day and your business is just gonna fall apart. And it's like, that couldn't be further from the truth. But I think that that again is a fear that we've been fed to manip not Yeah, manipulate us into doing whatever it is the staying in the flow. Staying in the structure. Yeah, right staying till five o'clock, even though your work isn't done. Now, if I had a project I was working on, I could have stayed there till seven o'clock, because I was so in to what a passionate write about whatever it was, but just to sit there for no good reason to me, was just absolutely on my comprehension.

Well, and I think the other part of this, and I had somebody say to me recently, right, but I decided I wouldn't do that schedule. And I still feel bad about it sometimes. Yeah, like this is practice, like, I've still feel bad Friday afternoon, my brain said I was late. I have been working on my own schedule for almost 10 years. And my brain was like, You are so late. And I was like, Oh, God, thank you. But like, it's, it's a constant like you. It's constantly reminding yourself that the person who sets the rules and all of this is you. And it's that like, it's the practice of that, just like anything else, you don't get on a bike. We were watching the Olympics last night, and we were watching these 13 year old girls skateboard. In the Olympics, it was wild. And my son came downstairs and there he was like, Well, how is it okay for them to be 13 the Olympics, like, actually, it's probably all they do, is practice this. But they've been practicing their whole lives. Basically, they probably they like the one hopped on and off, like, like it was an extra foot. It was wild. And it's that practice. So she just constantly thinks in those modes. Like if you constantly think I make the rules, it becomes natural. It just takes time, because that's not the message the world gives us. No, and it brings me to a really important part important part of my work. Is this intuitive knowing that we have and resetting that I know for a fact. I mean, maybe in my classroom, it happened. But generally speaking, we weren't teaching the young ones to use their intuitive No, knowing their gifts. Everybody has it on the planet. So if you say that haven't been, I'm not intuitive, I just say it's been underdeveloped. Right? If you never did trigonometry and did whatever is involved in trigonometry, doesn't mean you couldn't do it. You just haven't gone down that path. And so to me, what do you do if you really want to start changing and practicing something different? This is where intuition comes into play, like using the things beyond just what we can see in front of our face. And I think, I believe I know myself as a teacher, and I know you too, it's like, we were doing those things, right? intuitively, when a student when something was going wasn't going right or something happened. If you tried X, Y, and Z, and it didn't work, when you pulled something else forward. Where did that come from? There is this knowing and there is this wealth, have access to our own inside development, with business with life, with all the things and again, most of us, we just haven't been to that school yet. And that's my mission as part of teaching now. And it's not teaching you Stacey's intuition or Stacey's talk, right? Like, it's helping you unlock your own intuition, because it might look a lot different than me. And I'm, that's where I'm an expert, because I can absolutely help people find that for themselves. And really, again, you start to use it in ways you're like, Oh, this makes life so much easier. There's clarity, or clarity. And it's like, Yeah, and it's, it's like my favorite Wizard of Oz line, you had the power all along?

Well, and it's that, like, it's funny. I talked to a person last week, who was new to me, and she and I were talking and I kept bringing to the same point about some doubts I think she was having about whether or not she could do this business thing. And she finally said to me, like, Why do you keep bringing us back here? And I said, you know, and she's been a teacher a long time. And I said to her, you know, when a classroom sometimes where you look at a student, you know exactly what's happening. And some of it is his experience. And some of it is you just know. I said, I just I know, this is what's happening here, like, do you do you know, this is what's happening here? And she went, Bull? Yeah, she's like, I don't know if I knew it for this. But it was this underlying like doubting her own abilities kind of thing that's running through. And I just, you know, there is that intuition and instinct and experience and all of that kind of combines together. Teachers use that all the time. Teachers are great. You know, there's one thing about using it internally for your own benefit. But I think what teachers do best is turn that towards other people and use it to like, hey, other human like, do you see this pattern? I know this, is this thing happening here, or I'll have a student doing something, and I'll be seeing it online. I'll be like, Oh, this is what's going on here. My husband will go like, How do you know? Well, because I have this combination of experience and expertise and time. And just sometimes I just know, I know what they did. I know why. Because I've seen it all. And we've done it. But also just because, you know, I mean, you have those pieces, and you get to turn that intuition towards other people, and use it for their benefit, which is sort of the joy of teaching in a lot of ways. Totally. And so what if teachers took all of that energy, and then used it right, use what they have given so generously and beautifully to the world, and give it to themselves to and I always use the metaphor of like the heart three years ago, I heard somebody use this and it really resonated, the heart has to, to give blood and receive blood, right? Like there's this in inhale of your yoga person, the inhale and the exhale. Like, there isn't just one, there isn't just the outward, it's like, what if you really learned and took the time to use all of that? x? I love what you just said, expertise? Knowing experience for yourself is like, we're changing the world.

Real though, isn't it? Right? And that's the thing. Alright, so if there are people listening, and there are who are at the front end of all of this, where it's like, maybe maybe a business maybe step out, maybe, maybe maybe? What's the one thing you want to tell them? Like, what is the thing? I don't I hate the question like, What do you wish you have known? Because I don't think the world works like that. And I don't think we can know. I think people tell us things. Sometimes we can't hear them yet all of those things. Yeah. But like, What is? What is the thing that you wish they could hear?

So I will share what I heard, which changed my life and which is how I decided, in addition to a voice in my head that said, you're meant to open your own business. Um, I went, I went to unaware move, which is very unlike me, especially back then more, so I think I would do it today. I went to Atlanta, I live in Baltimore, I did not know anybody went to an event where there was a roomful of life coaches, I didn't even know. And a woman who did not know me came over at some point during the dinner. And she said to me, Stacey, she goes, I want to ask you one question. She goes, if this were your last year on the planet, what would you choose? Right. And I get goosebumps just thinking about it. And I was like, what I choose this job. As now you all have heard, I was not quite happy. And when I choose this, if this was was it, what do I choose? And it wasn't just business. But I mean, obviously was all encompassing. But but that made it so clear to me. And like this idea of I'm like, I always imagined myself, you know, the woman in the Titanic movie who like throws the jeweler over. And then that's how I want to go out of the world very gently and easily. And so I'm like, Okay, if I'm standing on the bone, and like, I'm looking back at my life, which is what she's doing, and that those scenes, it's like, Am I do I have I let fear, right? stop me from really like being all in. And for me, that question of like, okay, like, because life's equally too long not to be doing what we really want. And to short, right, like, you can be doing what you really want. Yes. And so what I found was and what also bolstered me right at that time, was there was a research article, The New York Times that was talking interviewing people the end of their lives. Nobody ever, ever, pretty much. Oh my gosh, I'm so glad I played it safe. I didn't take the risk. People say I wish I took more risks. I wish I went for the thing that I wanted to do. I hear it all the time with my clients, right? And so it's like, you don't need to wait for the perfect moment, which is I think another thing I'm always waiting for. When is the right sign it was like, you can create the perfect moment with to your point not knowing everything yet. But what is in your heart that you don't want to leave the planet on unfinished, it is funny. All of those things in my world came from my dad. There are many like shrug shoulder, Greg isms, but the the one that comes to me time and time again in business and in all the things is nothing ventured, nothing gained, like and he would just go like, you were like Hawk crap. And you know, you have to step out right your toe.

Yeah. And I told myself something very powerful in the moment. This is way before I knew, I really knew the power of thought work. If this doesn't work out, this was for me, I like to go worst case scenario, it makes me feel better. I know, that's like your worst case scenario, girl, I've let me know what they were. I was like, if this doesn't work out, I was like, Oh, my gosh, you've been a successful teacher been successful in business. What I said to myself is you will find you'll get back on your feet. If this isn't the right thing, you'll get redirected and it will all work out. So it's like, if you trust a no, it's always gonna work out. Like, what would you choose? Right? If you knew what was going to work out for you? 100% whatever it is, what is it that really, truly caused you and that helped me especially again, take that, take those risks. And I had a lot of stuff going on in my personal life. And I was like, if I could manage all that stuff, I could take a risk of business.

That was right, that trust you go back to where it's like, like, I they, I get made fun of in certain circles amongst my friends were like, I'm flipping stubborn. Like, y'all Listen, it's not that I question whether or not it's gonna work out because it is damn well gonna work out like it's gonna work out. I I had a conversation with somebody trying to sell me something a couple of weeks ago. And he said to me, like, Okay, how would it work? If you solve this problem? How would it look? How would it look in a year if you don't solve this problem? And I looked at him, and I was like, dude, listen, there's no version of this where I don't solve this problem. And he was like, well, but what if you didn't know I was like, right. I I understand your question. I understand this sales process. But that's not on the table. Pick a new question. He was like, I don't know what to do with you agree that is so true. Right? That's so grounded and anchored in you that again, what is the most anchoring thought for you that is going to help you in the moments? You're not sure you don't have to be 100% sure there was a coach. I don't remember who said it. Like, what if you're just like, 51%? Yeah, right. Yeah. tipping point of that. And it was like, that also gave me a lot of confidence. Because I was like, oh, okay, this is just putting me in this place. I don't have to be 100% Sure, of everything and all the things. It could be 51. I know. I'm like, I know. That's leaning that way. And that was really helpful to at the beginning kind of going about it that way.

Exactly. And here's the thing, like, you don't have to know what it's going to look like to know that you're going to get there. Like I'm, my stubbornness is like, Oh, no, it's going to work out. What do you mean? What is it going to look like when it works out? I don't freaking know. But I know it's gonna because I'm gonna it's gonna work. Dang it. So talk, tell me. Tell me how to have people find you. And we will link all this together in the transcript stuff. And tell me do you want to tell people about what's happening in

August? Of course, because again, I have somebody traveling out of town. So I am I love live person events, because I think they're such, again, everything we've talked about in the last hour, this community, this connection, when you're in person, the energy of that. So I am bringing all of the goddesses and if you are like, got a little like, that's not me, it is you because goddesses are all like, again, you're walking the planet, you've got goddess in you, you're embodying that, because to me, it's this place of knowing and trusting and building that relationship with ourselves. And being able to see seeing exactly who we are. This isn't like I've created some airbrushed, idealized version. No, I want you to be who you are. Show up, because that's going to make this event. Incredible. That's in August on the 26th. It's an evening event. So if you want more information about that, you can go to my website and look under my Events tab and you'll see the goddess gathering, and it will give you all the details. I am doing a free challenge next week. I'm having some fun in my free this week, which week, August 2, okay. Thank you for my clarification. And I'm always doing fun stuff in there. And that is all about so many people are always asking me see how do you know you're really getting an intuitive side? Right? That's like the question all the time. What do you mean how can I trust it? What do I know? And so we're going to just dive in. It was so much fun, get signs, learn about signs, all of that. And again, not Stacey signs your sign so if you want to get in Message every day next week and you want to learn how to do this on your own for fun with your business in your personal life. My Facebook group is called unlock your midlife magic.

Who is Stacey Stacey Stacey? Yeah, thank you. Thank you, this is fun. These are my most fun things ever. I like a good bad guest. And I like them with people. And it's such a treat for me. And I'm sure for everyone else. Because you know what i you are, you are proof that you walk into the teaching world and you knew what you were going to do. And then you walked away and thought like, Nope, I have this other thing. But I'm still teaching and I'm still out in the world. And I'm doing it a different way. But what you do is you serve a larger and larger circle and those people walk away and serve more and more and more. And it just extends the influence that you have on the world in a way that is just magically yours.

It I could talk to you forever on a podcast, the infinite infinity podcast I'm in for that. Yeah. And talk y'all listen.

Thank you for honoring teachers so much, because I think so often teachers, you know, maybe are misunderstood that they kind of, they don't always get the attention that they deserve, how amazing they are. And I really do believe they are change agents for the planet. So this is how we do it, whether we're in the classroom, whether we're in business, we take that kind of innate, those gifts that we have our superpowers, and we share them with the world in such beautiful ways. So for everyone, that's a teacher. however you define that and look at that. Kudos to you because this you're doing an amazing job. Teachers belong at the heads of all the tables, people totally. So listen, we will have all of Stacey's stuff linked in the show notes. If you are looking, we will link in her gathering. And then also like if you're wanting to talk about coaching, if you are a teacher in the world, and you're like huh, teaching in business, and how do we speak these languages together, like send a message, come talk to her, come talk to me, come talk to all the people, you'll find your person, find your person because having a person to walk next to you, instead of reinventing the wheel the entire time, really does make a frickin lot of difference. And it doesn't have to be me or Stacey, it can be whoever is speaking to your person. But you have to find the human that you can stand elbow to elbow with and be like, oh, because every now and then somebody says something and you're like, oh, I've been doing this the hardest way possible crap. So it really is about finding the way that makes this all easier for you without also at the same time buying 400 courses. So please don't do that. Please don't say to the teacher, I was  guilty of some of that at the beginning. All of us all of us are so we see you take your finger off the button and go work with a human please. Alright, well thank you all it is a pleasure and we will see you on the next one.