How the Heck Does Motivation = Weather??

Hey everybody, welcome to Episode 27. I think…it's not good when I can't remember what episode number this is. So doesn't matter. Welcome to this episode today we're going to talk about commitment versus motivation. So one of the things I hear from people all the time is like I've lost my motivation. Or I feel like I've lost my momentum. That's the other way it comes out. And for me, this is normal. Like we are not all motivated all the time, we do not all have momentum all the time. We those are not things that we get to hang on to like that. And so today, I want to talk about the difference between momentum and motivation and commitment. And the way I approach this, and the way I teach clients to approach this so that a when they're, quote, unquote, lost, it's not a problem and also, why you don't have to think about it that way if you don't want you. But before we go any further, I want to just take another minute to talk to you about the challenge. I'm running in two weeks, so it's starting the week of June 14. I am running an email challenge for my for people that sign up for this particular list, called selling without salesy. So if you are someone that thinks to yourself, like oh, sailing is icky, or it feels slimy, or I feel salesy, or any of those things, and you would like to find a way to sell what you're doing effectively sell your products or your services, without feeling icky all the time. This challenge is for you. Every day for five days, you're gonna get delivered to your email, a quick video along with some action steps. So that you can, you know, try a different way. I promise that at the end of the week, you will have a framework for how to approach selling without feeling salesy anymore, we can leave selling the spammy and the slimy and the salesy behind, you can be done with that, like, you don't need to cold message people on Facebook anymore. It's not required. All those things that people are telling you to do, like selling via spam messages on LinkedIn, those can all go away. Like basically, I was talking to somebody yesterday about it. And she said, Oh, I'm just gonna start sending messages on LinkedIn that are like, Oh, you know, here's my name. Here's what I do. Here's my product, what do you want it? In? My answer was like, would you say somebody? Would you walk up to a stranger in the street and do that? She said, No, like, Well, why would you sell it on LinkedIn that way. So it is a very, my approach is different. And it is simpler. And it doesn't involve any of this ugliness because it's not required. I built a business without it. I have plenty of clients that are building businesses without it. You don't have to build a business with the shakiness. So if you want to sign up for that email challenge, you can come into my facebook or my LinkedIn, there are links to join the challenge there, you can send me an email at sara@torpeycoaching.com, and you can ask me to sign you up. Or you can come on to my Facebook profile. There's also a link to the challenge there. Come play, it's going to be fun. Plus, it's coming to your email, you can do it whatever you want. Which is going to be the best part because it's flexible. Because y'all we are busy. everybody's busy. I get it.

Okay, so let's talk about motivation and momentum and commitment. So, I was thinking earlier how I was gonna paint a picture of this for you. And I was thinking about an analogy, because, you know, I like a good analogy for momentum and motivation versus commitment. And so for me, I think of momentum and motivation, like I think of the weather. And today here in southeastern Pennsylvania is a really good example. This morning, we got up and it was like 65 and sunny. Right now it is like 55 and it's two o'clock in the afternoon right now. It's like 55 and pouring rain. And tomorrow it is going to be 90 degrees. So the weather is changeable. it flexes it moves. It's totally different from minute to minute and you've had moments like that right? where you're like, I'm really honest things are going well in some one thing happens some one person says something you get One message, you get one thing and it like, derails your entire train of thought and your train of thinking and you feel like you've lost it all, like, broke your stride, right? So that is momentum and motivation. It just like snaps in a second, you're like, Oh, no, it's gone, I lost it. commitment. For me, the parallel is more like the phases of the moon. So here's the thing, if you look on your calendar, like if you have a wall calendar like I do, the phases of the moon are on there. Because they're predictable. The moon moves through its phases, every 28 days, this is how it works. It is always here. It's never different. It continues on and on and on and on and on in the cycle, the same cycle over and over again, is dependable, it is present and it's not going away. That is commitment. Versus the weather, which is a mess. So when you are thinking about your business, do you want to be motivated? Or do you want to be committed? For me, what I come back to time and time again, is that I am committed, I'm here for 30 years, I think of my business as a 30 year business. And that is a thought Actually, that's really helpful for me, I am in this for the next 30 years. For you, it could be that you're in it for the next 20 years, the next 10 or whatever, however it is you want to look at it. But think about it like a really long period of time. Because if you do, then here's the thing that happens. Like the phases of the moon aren't fazed by it being Tuesday and rainy. They just continue on. Right? They're not fazed by, like they don't freak out, the moon doesn't like decide to go off its orbit. Because the humans down here on earth did something stupid, right? My business isn't gonna get thrown off its axis. Because I had a bad day, my business isn't gonna be thrown off its axis. Because someone said no, or someone didn't agree with something I posted. Or someone told me I was doing a bad job or a client disappeared or whatever. It's not gonna throw me off my access. Because I'm here I'm here, it's just is my business is here it is going to succeed. Those are phases of the moon kinds of facts, I am committed to doing whatever it takes. In so for me, because I know I'm committed. I know that in that sometimes I'm gonna have crappy weather. We all have times like this, like, I will say like, I had plenty of tears in the last week. And some of it was business and some of it was life. Last week, we had to say goodbye to our cat, who was 20. And I have had that cat, she has lived in our house with me and slept with me every night for 20 years. And you know, like saying goodbye to her was really hard. And it was hard for my kids. And it was hard for all of us. And I spent you know, three or four days kind of just like staring at the walls and thinking like Oh, man, like I'm not getting very much done. But I was just sad and whatever, I'm sad, but four days in 30 years is okay. Because my business won't die. I'm not going to give up for months on end, I'm not going to take endless breaks. And during those four days, I still work some I posted I connected I showed up for my clients, I put my internal drama aside, but I wasn't as motivated as I normally am. I wasn't writing as much I wasn't connecting as much. And I was just you know, like I am. And I didn't actually I spent a couple of days not wanting to be sad and not wanting to admit How sad I was. And then I talked with a couple of colleagues on Tuesday and spent a fair amount of it crying which was kind of a mess. And you know they keep kept chugging it on me because I think they think I'm melting. But I would say that, you know, everybody's gonna have weather. Weather is a part of what happens. We have days like today where it went from sunny to rainy to hot to cold, whatever. And then we have stretches where it's like fair skies and sunshine. And it feels great. And we think that that's the way it's supposed to be all the time. But no matter where you live, it's not fair skies and sunshine all the time. It's not always perfect weather And so we expect our motivation, and our momentum to just continue onward and upward all the time. And that's not a fair expectation. It's like expecting son every day in southeastern Pennsylvania for a year. And being mad every time I didn't get it, I would be mad a lot. But what I have to lean back on what you have to lean back on is commitment. Are you committed? Are you in this for 30 years? And if you're not, it's time to ask yourself some hard questions. It's time to figure out why not in what might be better for you. Like I talked to a client a couple of months ago. And she was someone with a couple of businesses. And when we were talking about one of them, she kind of said, you know, like, I just don't want to do this one anymore. That's why I haven't been doing what I need to do. And that is, okay, things end. So what, like, okay, she had another business, it was going great, because she was totally committed. If it's time to change something, make a change. You know how this works at some point, you know, like, I was a teacher, so many of you are teachers, you were in a classroom, or you're in a classroom, and you're thinking of moving into the business world. And at some point, you're like, yep, it's time for me to go, it's time for me to change. I have a neighbor who is a teacher, it's time for her to change. She hasn't quite got there yet. But you spend so much time banging your head against the wall, you think like, I don't want to be here. That's when your commitment has shifted, rather than your motivation or your momentum. Because you might still be motivated to show up for your kids, you might still have momentum and have things going well, but you have to really pull yourself to it. So check your commitment, lean back on it. If it's, if you're 100%, into what you're doing, and you can say to yourself, like, Look, I'm gonna do what it takes to make this work. That's what I leaned back on all the time, like, I believe it's gonna work. I'm committed to doing whatever I need to do, and I will stubborn my way through this folks. Good, bad or ugly?

And if your answer to the question of commitment is like, it's kind of squishy, it's time to play around and figure out what it would take for you to be fully committed. And what that would look like, because sometimes being fully committed and being like, yeah, I'm in this for 30 years is scary, right? Especially if you're not sure it's gonna work. But here's the thing. If you're not sure, if it's gonna work, it's not gonna work. Because if you're not sure nobody else's, and people can't buy from you unless you are sure. So that is motivation, momentum, and commitment. Your job is to check in on where you are. How is your commitment working right now? Where are you on commitment? And what are your expectations of your motivation and your momentum? Are you expecting all fers guys all the time? If you are, how do you want to shift that to something more like the weather? Because that's what motivation and momentum are they are whether commitment is the moon. Alright? Again, if you want to join this selling without salesy challenge, come find me. And I will get you signed up. If you are looking for help, because you're committed, but you're feeling really stuck, please reach out. Let's talk about coaching. I know exactly how to help you move from committed to, to having the momentum you want. Having better weather than you have right now to use to extend the analogy. We can, we can mess with the weather a little bit we can science it. And if you have questions about that, listen, you don't have to be perfectly Sure. If it's gonna work for you to get on the phone and talk about it on zoom. Let's talk about it and see if it's a good fit for you. If it's not, I'm not going to drag you to it, because I want it to work for you just as much as you do. So I'd love to talk about it. If you're ready to talk about it. Or if you're considering it, please let's have a conversation about coaching. And otherwise, hit me up. Let me know how you're going on motivation and commitment and I'll talk to y'all soon. Have a great week.