How to Find Your Lane

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Welcome, welcome. Welcome to another episode of Teachers in Business. Today we are talking about lanes. Because I hear a lot from people out in the world about, you know, you hear a lot of advice like how you've got to just, you just have to find your lane, you just have to find your lane. And that advice is all well and good if you have any inkling what's in your lane, or you know what it looks like there or if but if you're not sure exactly what your lane is, or how you actually find your way there, then that advice is trash. And it's frustrating trash. It's, you know, it's it's basically like go, you know, here's a compass, good luck, that sucks. So if you're not sure how to find your lane, and you're not sure you're in the right lane, or you have questions about finding your lane versus you know what's not in your lane, because the idea of a lane is that some things are in it, and some things are not right. It is this whole zone of genius conversation. Today, what I want to talk about is literally finding your lane. What I want you to know right here at the out of the gate is that you are closer to finding and knowing your lane than you realize. I talk to people about this all the time, and they come to me and they go, You know what, though I'm totally all over the place. And they're not. It just feels that way to us. So the good news is you're closer than you think to find your lane, you may actually already be squarely in it, and just not have realized it yet. So today I'm going to share some of my favorite tools for you Lane finding and reducing the lane drama all the way around. Before I happen, I want to tell you about a webinar I'm hosting in a couple of weeks, it is going to be on Wednesday, April 13. I will link the registration link in the show notes in the transcript here. And it is called UNcomplicated Selling. If you I wrote the page for this last week, and I was like oh, these are the things I would want to know if you deeply wish that selling didn't feel so flippin complicated all the time, if you want to sell your services and products, but you also don't want to feel gross about it all the time. If you consistently want to make sales, but you don't want to fight the tack. You don't want to deal with funnels, I really and truly like I am well into business. And I don't want to do with funnels and I don't really understand and I don't want to. I mean, I do understand, but I don't want to fight the tack. And if you don't want to send 17 follow up emails every time you hold something, then great. And if you really want to sell effectively without stranger stalking, because you know stalking is illegal. This webinar is for you what I'm going to do in this free webinars free, it's an hour. And I promise, it's not going to be like 20 minutes of giving and 40 minutes of selling like you can't tell from this podcast. That's really not how I roll. It's really not how I roll. So I'm going to talk to you about and I'm in the webinar, I'm going to share exactly why selling feels so complicated for you right now why it's not working. What about selling is so complicated, like what is going wrong? And why that version of selling that you're trying to use right now is is not going to work? It's not working, you know, and why? What's the problem, we're going to talk about that problem. We're going to talk about the very highly uncomplicated process, three steps for selling without the IC without all the machinery and without stalking people that I teach my clients and I'm going to teach you and then we're going to talk about the two key questions to ask yourself that will allow you to take the process I share and actually make it yours. Because that's what matters. In the end. Like me just sharing my process and handing it to you like it's a bag of I don't know what rocks isn't any good. If you don't know what to do with the rocks, you're gonna walk away was some strong feelings, you are gonna feel relieved, because you will know it's not just you, you will know it's not actually you. That's the problem. And you will know that there is a way that works, you will feel energized because you'll know exactly what to do next. And you'll feel certain because you'll know that what you already are certain that what you're doing now isn't working, you'll get to feel certain that there is a process that can and will work for you. It's going to be really good. So you have to pre register on the Zoom link that I have in order to join us. I will drop that link in the show notes. But now let's talk about lanes. So deep breath. If you have Lane drama, here's what's happening. You have lean drama, if you are feeling like you can't decide what's in your later out of it, where it's like, yes, but I'm good at all of these things. Sound familiar? If that's you, that's Lane drama. If you're unsure, and you're like, well, but is that in my lane? There's some Lane drama. If you feel like you are driving a car and trying to use 16 lanes, the highway instead of just the one dedicated to you, Lane and drummer, if you're finding that you can't narrow down enough like it's feeling really unclear. When you explain to people what to do. They're like, right, but what does that mean? If you're getting like the right, but what does that mean? Like? What do you actually do questions? This is for you. And if you're really like feeling confused about your lane, if you're like, well, but I feel like what are all the different things I'm sharing, you're confusing people. What's work this out right now. So there are four things I want to share today. Number one, a lot of times, our niche, our lane, all of these things feel confusing inside our brains, they feel confusing in our heads. Because we are trying to hold three or four different things that we're thinking about all the time that we feel like aren't all interconnected. They might be they might not be. What happens though, is that the outside world doesn't see that siloing in your head, the outside world doesn't see that you're thinking in four different buckets. The outside world just sees one person who has thoughts about a bunch of different things. The outside world is not confused about what you do. Unless they're like really, but then I don't understand what you're doing. That's that's a different question. But the vast majority of the time, and that's when like things aren't quite narrow enough. You're trying to be everything to everyone. But generally, if you're feeling like you have at least you know, three or four lanes, you're close enough that people can see the whole of you. People on the outside looking in, see the whole of you. They're not confused about who you are and what you do. Like I have plenty of people that know all the things I do. I run an education, product business, I learned run a coaching business. I teach classes, I parent, I friend, I wife, those are all a lot of things. For people outside of me, they just see that I do all that. And they're like, oh, look, she does all that. They're not confused. So I don't have to be, I can be all of those things at once. And it's all right. What's interesting is we do not allow ourselves sacrifice that we would allow for other people, other people, you're like, oh, look, she's an author and a speaker and a business owner and a teacher and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And yet for ourselves in reverse. We're like, oh, so confusing. Why can I can be all these things at once. It's like when I say to my son, you know, mommy's boss is really awesome. And he'll be like, aren't you your boss? Or when I published the book last summer, and he was like, So you're an author now? And I was like, Well, yeah, and I do the other things. He's like, No, you can only be one thing. Listen, that's a seven year old notion. That's like a seven year old idea of work. You're not seven, you're older than that. So you can hold on to all of these different parts and be a hole and that's okay. So that's the first thing. Second, the first thing I want you to ask yourself, if you feel like you're having like true solid Lane drama, is what do people ask me for help with all the time. Really, like if you're just with friends or with colleagues, if you work in a school building, if you work in an office, if you work in you're running a business, when people call you in, they're like, hey, I need help with? What is it? What are the things your friends and colleagues and loved ones tell you all the time? And before you go crazy, and you're like, Oh, that's my lane. What you then need to ask yourself is Do you want that to be your lane, for example, I have a former client who, you know, people would come to her and ask for help in organizing. And they would also come to her and ask for help in making decisions. It turned out that what she wanted to do in her business was work with people on decisions and not organizing. She was really good at the decision making part of organizing, which is why they came to her. But really the core of what she was doing was about decision making. And that's where she decided to focus. So for you, you get to look at what people commonly come to you for what they come to you for that feels really easy to you. It should be something that feels really easy to you that you're like, Oh yeah, it's not a big deal. Right? Odds are you are discounting that because it can't be your lane, because it's not hard enough. stops at your lane. were the things that are easiest to you that they are your zone of genius. They're the things that are easy for you and hard for everyone else. So think about those things that people come to you for time and time again, like for me, people come to me with their complex, tangled things. Like I have friends that are like, Oh my gosh, I'm having XYZ, like, it's all this drama, it's all the stuff. They lay it all out on me. And I go like, okay, let's pick these three threads. And we'll work on those. And then they'll go like, Oh, look, I have a friend right now, who tells me all the time, like people tell you things, I just tell you things, and then you make them simple. Go. Yeah, that's my zone of genius. My zone of genius is untangling chaos and making it simple. So once you're in, you might have a couple. But what you then get to go is like but this is the one that's most fun. For me. This is the one that feels easiest, to me, this is the one that feels most like me, and do that. What you're not doing when you do that is closing all those other doors. My client who decided to work with people on decisions, sometimes the decisions she helps people make is to get rid of or keep things. Sometimes it's weight, getting the helping them get organized through decision make. Just because you choose something doesn't mean you turn off all the other options. I think what happens is when we go to make a decision, a choice, we're like, oh, but if I pick this one thing, I won't get these four other things. That's not what it is. It's not to say it's forever or be that it won't evolve, or even see that you're turning off all the other options. It's just saying that you're choosing this one right now. So don't overcomplicate it. Number three. When I think about my lane, I don't think about one thing. I think about you know, one overarching thing for me it is simplicity and uncomplicated thing. And then I think of 10 or 12 things underneath it like I can read them to you on my board right now on my whiteboard over here. There is something that says my lane at the top, and it's got 12 things underneath it. And they are what I think of as the core of what I talk about time and time again, as a business owner, as a coach, as a as somebody who offers resources and tools to other people. This is the core of what I offer. And I'll read you a bunch of them. It says business results can be simple. Consistency is the secret sauce. Evaluation is rocket fuel. You have to believe before you do how there's no right way. There's only your way you can just decide invitations beat selling every time presence is 90% of the game. Strategy equals talk to more people know your expertise, your value and your impact. You're capable right now you have the skills, failure is the foundation of success. And then I have celebrating and pricing. Like that's my entire business is like 150 words, for you. What I would suggest you do what I want you to try is to sit down and make a list of what the things are that you want to say over and over again, that you feel passionate enough about conveying to people that you would say 150 times and just keep that you're willing to like beat the dead horse over. I really, really work hard to constrain myself to 12 really hard. I pretty sure the first time I did this, my goal was 10. And I was like my I can't 1010 feels too constrained, I was missing important things. And I was like that. So I have 10 I have 12 might be 14. But I really do try to constrain this list, you can do the same. Sit down and ask yourself, what are the 10 to 12 things that you want to talk about over and over and over and over and over and over and over again. That's your lane. That's your zone of genius, like start with that overarching thing. And then work into what's in that bucket like I have a client that works with people on time management and productivity. So she's got a list of 10 or 12 key things in time management and productivity that that she really puts on repeat. I have another client who works in social media she's got you know, a handful 1012 things of things she has on repeat. I have another client who is in you know in a in a coaching scenario. She has a similar set of things. This is something we build in coaching. But really it's like dial into what the things are. You want to say over and over and over again that you feel compelled to say over and over again. Because honestly they're already there. You have the things that you beat over and over again already. You know what they are the drums that you are passionate about. Write them down, that's your lane. It's not as hard as you're making it. It doesn't have to be that's number three, number Here's what happens. We narrowed down, we decide what the overarching thing is, we decide the 10 to 12 things in our lane, and then we're like, right, but people are going to get bored. I'm going to say these things over and over and over again and people are going to get bored. No, they're not, let me be the one to tell you. They are not. They need to hear you say it again. You need to just keep saying it. You're worried that people are going to get bored, because you are worried you are going to get bored. But it is not your messaging that is going to you know, my coach tells me all the time, my messaging, his job is not to free my creative outlet. And I'm always like, on Damn, I wish it was, you are okay. It is okay. For you to say it over and over and over again. It is okay for you to say the same sentiment in 10 different ways over and over and over again, you will find ways to tell the story in different ways. But say the same damn thing like I have a post in my Facebook group every Friday about celebration every Friday, they vary a little bit. They vary on what we're celebrating and how, but it is always there. And yes, I am willing to beat that dead horse dead into the ground, I will ask it 52 Fridays in a row, it is fine, because it matters that much. So you have permission to repeat. Not only do you have permission, but you must take those 10 or 12 things and just beat them to death. You don't want to use the same sentence the same way 10 times because people are gonna be like, What are you doing. But you also have more creativity in you than that. You have stories, you have questions, you have experiences, you have all these things in your life that you can pull from. But you can use them to talk about these same things over and over and over again. And you should this is how you build a consistent business. This is how you stay in your lane. You just keep talking about the same stuff over and over again in a different way. And then people what's fascinating to me is people will be like, Oh, that one really makes sense. To me. It's just like in a classroom, you present the same content to kids over and over again, in a slightly different way. Like kids learn addition, in kindergarten, first grade, second grade, third grade, fourth grade, fifth grade, sixth grade, they just learn a different version of it. You talk about it, even when you're learning two digit addition, you learn it three or four different ways you learn it, you know, three or four different algorithms you learn three or four different ways with different manipulatives with on paper and pencil and your fingers in your head. Like all the ways you play games, you know, so even something one concept like addition, you can do 1000 things with you can tell that my math teacher brain just clicked in. But that doesn't make it boring. Like I literally could talk about math teacher things all day. And do sometimes. So don't worry about other people getting bored. It's not a problem. Don't worry about you getting bored, it's not a problem. And don't worry that it's going to be confusing. It's not allow it to be simple. Allow yourself to decide what's in your lane to define your lane yourself. And then just sit in it and get comfy like you're on a Sunday drive on a one lane road, driving off into the countryside enjoying the views. That is all this is. So if you are like but I cannot, I don't know what's in my lane, I need help. This is work that I do with clients, I'm really good at this. It's simple. I will help you make it simple. I do not have your drama about it. I have plenty of my own. But I've worked through it. And I don't have drama about this. So not only do I not have your drama, but I don't have mine about this anymore. So I know how to conquer it. I know how to teach you how to conquer it. And I know that it's not as bad as you think it is. I know you have a clear Lane already. I am confident in that. So if you are feeling like Holy God, I don't think I can do this. Or you're like you know what, it would be really helpful to have help with this. Fantastic. Come to my website. It's torpeycoaching.com book, a one on one coaching call let's you can have a free console to talk about coaching or you can send me a message and I will give you the link to sign up for one bite coaching which is 90 minutes of coaching with no selling. It's just you pay me I coach you it's simple. It doesn't need to be this complicated. You can do this and if you need help, I'm here to help. Happy sitting in your lane. Rocking out doing your thing for the people. You can do this. Keep going. I'll see you next week.